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THE GOAL (or at least as close to this as possible 2 children and 13 years later!!!)

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Mar 2012 - my son's 1st bday. I'd gotten back to my low wt from 2005, & actually liked how I looked

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July 1, 2013 - Our original family. I'm only 12 lbs away from my highest weight. It has to stop.

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July 6, 2013: I'm tired. And mad.

I feel tired ALL the time. I'm only 12 lbs from my highest weight ever, and it's still climbing. I despise how I look and feel, and I'm so sick of spending all day every day feeling like a failure, and hating how I look and who I've become. I'm beyond fed up with regrets and looking back flat-out angry at myself for all of the wasted years allowing myself to be miserable (and yes, this refers to way more than weight issues, but that's been the overarching issue for a long time now, and what drags me down the most now).

I suppose it doesn't really matter how I got here, and I quite frankly don't have the patience or strength to lay it all out again. It only matters where I go from here. I posted my ups and downs pics from the past 10 years b/c I'm simply amazed (baffled?) at how I could fluctuate so much, at how 25 lbs ago I still was unhappy with myself, but of course would absolutely love to be there again. Angry at myself for doing this - again. Especially since I know it is 100% of my own doing. I have no one and nothing to blame but myself and my pure laziness to do anything about it. I have absolutely proven without a doubt that if I don't actively stop doing what I have been, it's only going to continue to skyrocket and in absolutely no time at all, I will be right back at my highest weight. And there's that pesky feeling that if I don't get a grip on this now, my health is going to start to suffer - I've been SO lucky not to have had any (known) effects so far, but that luck's got to be running out quickly. That's something I just can't risk.

This ends. Now. I WILL start making healthy choices from now on. It's really VERY simple: Eat healthy food at home. Move my body. Repeat. The end. I may have let my story get waaaaay off-course, but I will make the choices I need to each and every day to get it back on track so that the rest of it is on MY terms.

The old chapter has been closed and locked up, and the new determined me will be writing the next one. And so it begins...

Member Since: 7/11/2008

Fitness Minutes: 5,163

My Goals:
- Move my body
- Be outside
- Plan meals so we cook and eat at home
- Limit junk food to controlled and reasonable amounts - aim for as many whole, unprocessed foods as possible.
- Journal on SP as much as I need to help me succeed
- Focus on spending our time and energy on what we value the most, not what's easiest

- Have exercise become a regular part of my life - many times a week, and be active in our free time as well. In my perfect, hopeful world, I will find exercises and active hobbies that I actually enjoy doing, and don't feel too self-conscious to do in front of people (so I'll conquer my constant worry of looking like an idiot, at least enough that it stops keeping me from doing things, but ideally I'll altogether stop even thinking about it).
- Eat healthy, with as few processed foods as possible
- Spend free time doing quality & active activities, preferably outdoors
- Eat out rarely

My Program:
- Healthy eating at home, as few processed foods as possible, and doing my absolute best NOT to eat out - we really just need to be done with it
- Plan meals and snacks each week so we're always prepared with healthy meals
- Cook all meals before the week starts, and make extras when possible to freeze

- Go on morning walks to start the day right, clear my head and get my body moving
- Dance and be silly with the kids every day - it'll get me active, and even better, add some laughs to the day
- Go on weekly family hikes
- For the first few weeks, ease back into exercising with some form of stretching, swiss ball stuff, or pilates, and then start formal workouts, to be determined

- Focus on cherishing every moment, making the best of every situation, and enjoying where and how I am right now
- Small changes, a little at a time, is all I need to succeed - it is ALL within my control. Focus on ea small choice, not the huge goal

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