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If you're here to read my story, please scroll past all the numbers. Thanks for stopping by and blessings on your adventure!

2/26 2013 New goals....

Main focus now is getting stronger with less stress and not so much on the scales.....per doctor's orders.

Cadio 3 days/week @ 25 mins/session 2/25.....MET GOAL!!
Cadio 3 days/week @ 30 mins/session 3/11.....MET GOAL!!
Cadio 4 days/week @ 30 mins/session 3/18
Cadio 4 days/week @ 30 mins/session 3/25 Change Nutrition/Fitness Tracker!!!
Cadio 5 days/week @ 30 mins/session 4/1
Cadio 5 days/week @ 30 mins/session 4/8 time for new routine!!! Platau Buster!!
Cadio 5 days/week @ 35 mins/session 4/15
Cadio 5 days/week @ 40 mins/session 4/22
Cadio 5 days/week @ 40 mins/session 4/29

My Target Heart Rate:
2/25, 3/4 130bpm
3/11,18, 25 & 4/1 135bpm
4/8, 15, 22, 29 141bpm Stay here for several weeks!!!!

Every 6 weeks I will aim for a new routine!!! Platau Buster!! This will help to keep my body guessing, working hard and not getting bored with my workouts. Keep it fun!!!

Eat healthy.
Get plenty of rest.
Follow exercise program....low intensity only.
Drink my 4 cups of water daily....no more than this!!!

**Refer to my favorites in SP for more ideas on how to give myself variety in my exercise program.

Consider cross training!!!

Unfortunately, due to an overload on my plate, I've had to drop out of my 5% Winter Challenge. This is a sad place in my journey but I feel it is for my best at the moment. Until we get something better than dialup for internet, it just takes too much time to do things online. I'll try to check in on SP weekly, but that's going to be it for now. Thanks to everyone for keeping up with me, encouraging me and just stopping by from time to time to say "hi". Blessings to all!!!
So, I've changed my Name from W8n4HimOnly to Tawanda_IS_Back....It's still me, Janet, just with a NEW attitude and a NEW goal. A NEW determination to reach a place in my life I have not been for quite some time BUT I WILL get there.....I HAVE A PURPOSE!

UPDATE : Nurse told me today that I getting down to my healthy BMI, I will be eligible to be placed on the transplant list! You better believe I WILL DO THIS!

I try to put God first in all I do. I'm a wife and mom, a kidney dialysis patient, a legal secretary....I wear many hats :) I'm pro-life and when God needs me in our local Sav-A-Life center, I volunteer with ladies that are post abortion. It's definitely something you must be called to do or been through or both. I love to meet new people, go out and have a blast. Watch movies, read a good Ted Dekker book or just be quiet and meditate.

When I was in high school, I thought I was a big girl because I was always compared to my younger and always thinner sister. I found out when I was 15, and dating for the first time, that I had a kidney disease, which for several years we controlled by diet. I ended my relationship with that boy because I was scared I'd die and leave him like my dad left my mom......she was 27 when he passed away and left with 2 young girls under the age of 10. I didn't want to do that to someone I loved so much. So, I let him go.

When I had my son at age 18, I was told I would need dialysis or a transplant within 2-2 1/2 years....doc hit the nail on the head. At age 20, I found myself doing Peritoneal Dialysis with a 2 1/2 y/o son and husband....yeah, I know what I said earlier, but life happens. I was so weak, so thin and still thought I was huge. I didn't know huge until much later......

December of 1993, I had my transplant and turned 21 in the hospital. When they started the anti-rejection meds, life as I knew it, well, it definitely changed....my body as well. Literally overnight my face went from being incredibly thin to looking like the Pillsbury Dough Girl gone bad! I was given a meal that I hadn't had in years.....bacon, bacon and bacon! I was like, um this isn't my plate. The docs laughed and said, yes, it is. They also told me I could eat anything I wanted.....somehow they forgot "in moderation" with that and well, add all those steriods for 16 years straight along with "you can eat whatever you want" and changes in medication with side effects that literally stated "may cause increased cravings for sweets".......which in other words caused me to crave a 5lb. bag of sugar - NO LIE! - in a week! Add all of that up and you get a 272lb woman 16 years later.

After the death of my Mamaw in July, my 17 y/o brother in October and the finality of my marriage in January, 2004 became the year of loss for me. Six months later, my kidney began to die and so did I. In June of 2004, I was admitted into the hospital. Little did I know until the day I was discharged, they did not expect me to leave.....alive. God showed up and showed them!
After the loss of my transplanted kidney, docs took me off the anti-rejection meds, steriods, and the weight started to fall off. I was working out nearly 2 hrs a day in the gym 5-6 days a week and loving it. I lost about 70 pounds and was feeling great....then life happened again...

I found myself in 2009 for the 2nd time in my life in need of dialysis. I also had been dating off & on for a few years but nothing serious....I was totally afraid of commitment.

October 2009, I began PD again.....didn't work so they had to start me on hemo dialysis. My worst nightmare. Around this same time, I told God that I was through dating and that it was time I allowed Him to place the man He had for me in my life because I was messing everything up. I also told Him that He would have to put this man in my face if He expected me to realize he was sent from God. Two weeks to the day, my phone rang (how much more in your face does it get?) and it was the first guy I ever dated, the one I always loved but never thought I'd see again........5 months later, yep, I did it! We were married and have been living this thing they call life ever since.

Bless my hubby's heart, he married a fat, kidneyless girl LOL He's been a champ. He tries to perk me up when I've had my "fat" days. He tries to understand when I want to trash my dialysis machine....oh, btw, he's my wonderful caretaker! We do NxStage dialysis at home which is great if you have to do dialysis ;) Believe me, he's got to have some patience with me cause I know I can try it sometimes :( He supports me in anything and everything I want to do ..... ok, minus giving up on dialysis. He simply won't hear of it. Otherwise, yes, he supports me. He loves me despite all of this fat, never says a negative thing....doesn't even make me feel fat. Now that is a real man! Sorry ladies, he has no brother :( LOL

So, we come to the here and now.....why I want to lose this weight. It isn't to have a transplant....I'm not eligible due to an incisional hernia repair surgery a year ago. It isn't to make my hubby happy. It isn't to feel pretty because believe it or not, I do feel pretty most days ;)

I want to lose weight for me.

I want to lose weight to be as healthy as I can possibly be.

I want to live a healthy life.

I want to hike in the mountains without passing out! LOL

I want to scuba dive.......fat floats, it doesn't sink!

I want to be an example of what healthy should look like while on dialysis....I KNOW it can be done and I want to do it!

God willing, I'll be able to do all of these things and more. For now, I will start off small and when I reach my goal, I'll be able to say "Wow! I came a long way and look what was inside!"

I hope this encourages someone. If you need a buddy, message me, send me a friend request......we can do this together!

Member Since: 1/17/2013

Fitness Minutes: 772

My Goals:
I want to lose weight for me so that I can be as healthy as I can be and live as long as I can on dialysis. I want to be a positive influence in others' lives. I would love to participate in a sporting event again, such as Softball or a walking marathon....just to be active & healthy :)

By January of 2014, I want to be the NEW me.

My Program:
I'm just getting started .... but at least that's more than I was doing yesterday :)

I've begun using my Leslie Sansone DVDs at 10 mins/day. I'll gradually increase the time.

Strength training will be done with resistence due to physical limitations set by docs.

Personal Information:
My name is Janet and I'm from the deep South. I love living close to the water, reading great christian fiction (mystery, thrillers, just not the romance stuff), my bible and anything that will challenge me to become a better person. I don't watch much tv but I love movies.

Other Information:
God is good and has seen me through so much. I just want to be a blessing to others.

I knew I always wanted to be somebody. now I just have to be more specific. - Lily Thomlin

You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, 'I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.' You must do the thing you think you cannot do. ~ Eleanor Roosevelt

If you don't love yourself before, you won't love yourself after. Adore your body at every weight.

Being defeated is often temporary. Giving up makes it permanent. - Marilyn von Savant

Read More About TAWANDA_IS_BACK - Profile Information moved here. (Updated March 16)

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