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Difficult time

Thursday, May 15, 2008

*I have posted this in threads already but anyway here goes...

I have been doing really good lately with keeping up with eatting right and getting in my exercises. But last night I couldn't. I made the excuse that my leg was hurting after I hit it getting out of the pool the night before, yes it was sore, but I could of still gone. Instead after I ate dinner which was a little piece of steak and some corn, I went back into the kitchen, grabbed the icing can and spoon and started eatting it. I don't know why I did but I did. Not only that I had a can of coke, which I have been coke/pepsi free for a month, and ate some more. It is like I didn't care about all the hard work that I have put in the past month. Thought that I would of been excited and motivated as I just lost 8 pounds.

I don't know if it is cuz my brother is moving to Colorado on Sunday and I am in Illinois, or that today is my sister's wedding anniversary and I am still single. Did I mention that she is YOUNGER than I am? Perhaps it is looking at before and after pictures I see some weight loss, but I am fixiated on the fact that I can not stand up straight. Long story on why that is. I just want to cry and give up. Wondering if it is all worth it.

The funny thing is today before I left for work I tried on a pair of size 28 pants that I recieved for Christmas year before last that were too small for me then. Couldn't get them past my hips and butt, but today I was able to get them up my hips and past my butt and fastened. Granted they were just a little tight yet, but a matter of a couple of weeks I know they will fit me good. I could not even get excited about that. I just look at how great everyone is doing on my teams, and then pictures ... I just feel everyone is so beautiful, and I am the ugly duckling. Don't feel beautiful or pretty at all. Just don't like myself very much at the moment.

I hate being such a downer. I know there are others out there that have more difficult problems than what I am going through and I just feel like a baby right now.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Hey, girl, there must be something with this weather we're having (I'm in Western KY), because I did great last week and this week... sheesh, let's jusy say I've got to get my booty moving! You can do this!!! I'm right here behind you to give you a nudge if you need it!!!


    4718 days ago
  • TAZ675
    Hey Girl!! Don't beat yourself up...remember you didn't put all the weight on overnight, it's not going to come off that quickly either. BUT it will come off quicker than it went on :-)
    When you get down and thinking about what "everyone else has" remember that they can have everything you envy and still not be happy. You just need to find your own happiness within.

    When I feel lonely and see that couple in the mall or whatever and feel envious, I remember that they may be together but they may also be miserable.

    The next time you start making excuses why you want to eat, or not excercise, or whatever, remind yourself that YOU are in control, and you DESERVE to be healthy and happy! And no one can take that away from you :-)

    I still slip from time to time, I've been slacking too much on the excercise lately for my liking, but I will not give up, I will not be defeated! Mostly I do not want diabeties...that is honeslty my biggest motivator, to get off my prescriptions for the illnesses caused by the fat...

    It will always be a struggle, but the struggle gets easier over time...I promise... emoticon emoticon
    4718 days ago
    I am sorry that you feel that way-I go through the same type of moods where I'm real down on myself. You and I have got to remember to not keep them going. Don't "feed" them like we (over-) feed ourselves. As soon as we think those un-truths, think of something else, NOT related, even if it is, "Wow, the neighbors dogs are loud tonight." You know, a nice, neutral statement. I won't go as far as to say "a nice, positive statement," because when I'M feeling that way, I certainly can't think of anything positive.

    Take care, buddy, and remember, we are all pulling for you!
    4719 days ago
    I'm excited for you about the pants!!

    4719 days ago
  • TWEAVER0715
    Don't beat yourself up so much. You are a beautiful person. Don't worry about the slip it happens to all of us. You should be so totally pumped that you can get into those pants. I read an article I wish I could remember where but it talked about how once we start suceeding and lose the weight we it is like are mind freaks out and instead of excitement we feel worse. Don't let this happen to you. And don't think you are being a baby everyone needs to vent....that is how we get the encouragement and support we need. Plus....girl we just kicked all those butts. BSD rocks and that is with the help of you. Smile!!! make today a better day.
    4719 days ago
    You have taken the first step to getting back on track, reaching out. You can do it! Just remember how well you have done and that it is an inspiration to the rest of us. I GAINED 2 pounds this week! After beating myself up, I started back on good habits. Keep on the right track and you will begin to feel better. We are here for you. emoticon
    4719 days ago
    By expressing what you are feeling rather then hoarding those emotions, you are actually helping yourself a whole lot. Don't you find that when you are able to express whatever you are feeling, the feelings of needing to eat dissapate? I think that is why alot of us are overweight. We feel we don't have the right to be angry, or hurt or mad. We have to be the good person all the time. Ever notice thin people, they say what they need to and don't apologize.

    Sorry for the long post. I just really wanted to say....you are doing great, and don't apologize for feeling down!
    4719 days ago
    It is ok to have a bad day...everyone does. Just pick yourself back up and start again. You will move past this and just think about what you have accomplished so far!
    4719 days ago
    Hey there. Losing weight is tough it takes lots of work. You didn't gain the weight overnight, although it may feel like it. Your not going to lose it overnight either.

    You have made great progress, with your weight and your other life challenges.

    All I can tell you is "GET BACK IN THE POOL". So you fell of track one night. Now get back to it and in a couple of weeks those Christmas pants will fit. I think that will get you excited.

    Give yourself credit for what you have accomplished. Nobody needs to judge themselves by what other people do or are doing. We are all unique, as they say "all in due time".

    Yes you feel alone here in Illinois. Family isn't just blood relatives, we are here to be your surrogate family too. My blood family is 4 hours away. Good friends can fill that gap better at times. They don't know all your childhood secrets to tease you about and all the buttons to push to set you off. LOL My family is very good at setting me off.

    Have you talked to your accountability partner?

    4719 days ago
  • DEUCE119
    emoticon You know what , we all falter. I just did. I'm trying to quit smoking and I had half a cigarette. i really want to quit but I always sabotage myself. When you are trying to lose weight and doing it sometimes it can be wonderful and scary all at the same time. You are used to what you have and you wonder if you can handle the new you. It will open up doors to work and people that you aren't used to. I always had a hard time with attention from men coz I wasn't used to positive attention from them. It can be very scarry so don't get down on yourself for the frosting and the coke. Remember how good it feels to get on that scale and see that you have lost weight.
    You can do this!! don't get discouraged, we are all here for you. emoticon emoticon
    4719 days ago
    I feel like a baby all the time then. I have horrible self esteem, and I always feel so ugly around everyone. I can always spot the amazing beautiful things on everyone but me. That girl may have a bigger waist, but my god, look at how GORGEOUS her face is. I'm so jealous. Or wow, that girl is beautiful...look at her petite little body in that black dress....I wish I looked like that...

    I do that ALL THE TIME. And I know I'm DONE now. I need to stop. Other times when I tried to stop, I tried pointing out all the bad things on each girl. That didn't help either. That just made me into this huge pessimistic critical MESS.

    So, instead of looking at the other girls and thinking about how beautiful they are or about how ugly that part of them is, I try to think about them as more than just looks. Life is so much more than a pretty face.

    Guys are more attracted to confidence than they are to weight. Period. That's that, and that's all there is to it. Guys are SO MUCH MORE attracted to confidence than weight, no matter how much it can seem otherwise. That's just a general rule, though, and there are ALWAYS exceptions, but still. Confidence is an amazing tool and can get you anywhere. It's hard to have confidence sometimes, and sometimes it's easy.

    But I know you can do it.


    This is so worth it - not just for the superficial wanting to look so freakin HOTT, but for the health bene's. Being healthy is such an amazing reward on it's own. You feel better, you're happier, and you look amazing (no matter what weight you're at!).


    I'm rooting for you, chica! I'm ON YOUR SIDE!
    4719 days ago
    I saw you needed some support on the huddle wall, so I thought I would come by and give ya some DONE luv...

    You are doing so wonderful, 28 lbs down, and getting into clothes you haven't been able to yet, thats all great !! It's so natural to get down sometimes, even when things are going great, we're women, and it happens, and sometimes we just don't know why.

    When it happens to me, I try not to let it get to me, read some stories on SP, cry some, call out for help, like you did, and let us all come to the rescue, thats what we are here for, then hold up your head, forget what you ate yesterday.... and make today different, go do your workouts, and feel better, sometimes you just have to make yourself do it, and you'll thank yourself tomorrow !!

    Your strong, your beautiful, and you can do this !!
    Your a DONE girl now, go get em !!

    4719 days ago
    Don't be so down on yourself, all of us have fallen off the wagon sometimes. The important thing is getting back on. Remember how good you felt when you were going strong and how crappy this has made you feel. We feel good when we're sticking to our plans (at least I do). Today's a new day - just keep going. You can do it!
    4719 days ago
  • C.G.12
    There is nothing wrong with "feeling like a baby". Everyone needs some extra encouragement once in awhile.

    Remember...this is a marathon, not a sprint. There will be LOTS of bumps in the road and how you pick yourself up afterwards is all that matters.

    If you feel like you are surrounded by temptation - get rid of it! Throw out that frosting, recycle those cans and restock up on the good stuff. And remember to treat yourself once in a while! You shouldn't punish yourself for your hard work by denying it further.

    So today is today. Forget about what happened yesterday and look at how you can make today a better day. Don't set yourself up to fail - you need to look in the mirror and tell yourself that you ARE beautiful and you want to be able to show the world how beautiful you are.

    If you need anything or more motivation, just turn to me or the rest of the Done girls! We are all here FOR YOU and we all care about you. We want you to succeed just as much as we want ourselves to succeed.


    4719 days ago
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