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MYSTYBELLA
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One person's *whale* is another person's goal...

Monday, June 16, 2008

After getting some sleep and doing my daily affirmations and just getting quiet with myself a lot of answer's came to me. Some answer's to thing's i didn't even realize I had asked about hehe.

I love to wander around this site and see other people's pages/thoughts etc. It seems I let old demon's get into my head when seeing a batch of pages where people spoke of themselves in such a cruel manner. I have been guilty of that myself so that wasn't the issue. My inner issue's are with people who are my height range and have starting weights of what a doctor say's I *should* weight: 115-130 and proceed to call themselves beached whales, gross, fat and other negative words. While I get that a person still wants to lose weight and feel's heavier then they are comfortable with~and in no way will I EVER see a woman or man who weighs in that range and think oh that's a fat girl sorry LOL~ it just made me feel like crap that something I am told I should weigh is seen as a beached whale by some who weigh that much. I admit I was doing the same with my short term goals~I'd LOVE to reach 175 and then 150. So seeing people who weigh that much and saying the same things: I look like a fat cow, a beached whale (what the hell are we saying this stuff about ourselves for anyway?!?!) etc. was making me feel so depressed and like just giving up. And THAT for me was HUGE!!!! No pun intended. =o) At first I had no idea what was going on, just that I was angry and being self abusive to myself the past 3 days. My Spirit was not happy and this is usually the point I'd have given up and went back to old ways of hating myself.

Now I am aware athat no matter what the weight, a person want's to feel and look good. And I know how hard that last 5-10 pounds is to let go off and how frustrating it can be for whomever is in that part of the journey. However, none of that changes that when any of us say we look like a fat cow, a beached whale, gross or like crap at whatever weight we are, it's not good. It's sad really that we are so easy to say something like that about ourselves but will look at a loved one/a friend or another human the same weight etc. and never even THINK to say they look like a fat cow (if we are in a loving place within ourselves) But we can do it to ourselves all day long. I am not excited about my weight but now I realize that my weight is someone else's goal weight~short term or whatever. So knowing that and knowing how much I love my friends and to support people, I can no longer say those kind of things about myself without saying them about other's and I just can't do that.

What a huge life and personal journey lesson this is for me! I feel so much better today and I did not go off track with my nutrition. Now I I could just pick up that fitness bug so many of you have.....hehe

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • AWESOMEFOREVER
    You hit the nail on the head. Thanks for expressing the thought so clearly.

    I go to some blog's to see that someone weighs less than me; hopes to lose much more. I let them know they are less than me and I am here to encourage them as they lose.

    I often have friends tell me that I have lost enough. I know what I would like to weigh. I also know where I was last year at this time.

    I also know what I weighed in 88 when I started this job.

    One size smaller in pants and a medium not large shirt. I was taller then. My feet were not so wide. My knees worked perfectly. I could sit on the floor, and get up without a problem. I had been taking care of children in my home daycare. Now, I deliver mail.



    Linda emoticon emoticon
    4510 days ago
  • FIT-LIFE
    I think you have just taken an important step in the healing process. I think you'lre starting to love and value yourself just a little more. This is a bigger accomplishment then a pound lost. So many people can't find anything about themselves to love. But you, baby, you're going to shine! Don't worry about the exercise thing. I think the key is figuring out what exercise you like, or at least don't loathe. You'll get there eventually. Keep positive and keep loving yourself. Done Luv.......Sheryl
    4511 days ago
  • MOJAVEMAMA
    Very insightful and very true. Thank you for sharing.
    4512 days ago
  • MOMOFMAX218
    What an awesome epiphany! Your words make perfect sense, and I'm glad I read them today. And you're totally right...No one's fat bothers me more than my own does. I know some gals who are heavier than I, but when I look at them, I see such beauty--the confidence in their stride, their impressive ability to find figure flattering clothes, their bright and gorgeous smiles, etc. THEIR fat cells don't even cross my mind. On the other hand, when I glance in a mirror, gosh, it's EVERYWHERE! I've been overtaken by chub-cells! It's so very easy to get negative about how I feel and what I see in the mirror (which is why I tend to avoid them...), and yet, so very easy to see beauty in others who probably share my same BMI number. *sigh* Guess that's just more for me to work on (or "off").

    Thank you for your wise and motivating words!

    emoticon
    4512 days ago
  • WOODLANDMYST
    Thanks for the thought provoking blog. My Spark journey has opened my eyes to many things in the past five months. Things I didn't realize were still with me decades later - things standing in my way of good health. You are on the right track - if we don't heal our Spirit, we cannot heal our bodies. The negativity has to go! Positive thoughts = positive actions.

    As for my fitness bug, I started out slow. Walked 3/4's of a mile three times a week. Then I kept adding a few steps here, a few steps there. Then a day. Now I walk 7 mornings a week, and I'm walking a bit over 3 miles at a time. It's become a habit now - I can't imagine not starting my day with a walk! What works for me too is getting it done in the morning - eliminates those late day excuses.
    4512 days ago
  • TELERIE
    I love your attitude and it's so true! We should all be kinder to ourselves and stop that negative self-talk. I know I've been guilty of that and working to free myself from it.
    Take care! Life happens on the way to our short- and long-term goals.
    4512 days ago
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