A bit of what makes me the person that stands with you on this journey
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Okay here is my story….
You may want to grab a glass of water and plan for a bit of an emotional story so reader bewares…
I have to start by telling you that I do not want or need sympathy or anything else, I just want people to understand why I’m the person that stands with you all in this journey to better health.
I have been an outcast in my town since the day my mother up and left us because she was not able to drink like she wanted to. MY mother left when I was about 7 years old and at the time she told me to my face that she never wanted to have a part in my life. She disowned me at that point because I would not leave my home to move in with her.
So the story begins there, my father raised me and my sister as though nothing happened but it did. My town was in an uproar about a man raising two young girls all by himself. So when it came time for my sister or myself to have a birthday party none of the children where allowed over our house. I’m talking about 1990!!!
So we where always looked down upon because they didn’t like it. Come on really does everyone always believes that children are to always be awarded to the mothers in a divorce. I think not some are just not fit enough to care for children or themselves.
But anyway growing up my father was such an amazing and dedicated mother and father to my sister and me. I can’t tell you how much this man must have given up raising us to be who ever we wanted to be. He never even once said that we couldn’t do something that we wanted to do. I remember when I told my father that I wanted to be a motorcycle mechanic and he responded that I should work hard to get myself to that point and he would be the first person in line to have his bike worked on! Then I wanted to own his business when he was ready to retire, he told me that I should and could because I know so much about his work that I could do it with my eyes closed. But he stated that I could do that as long as I never used any of the tools because he could not see his daughter having manly hands ever!!!
Like I said there where many times when I would have loved to have my friends sleep over, but I do not feel as though I missed out on anything in my life.
While most of the kids that I know where out playing in the summer I was working and making my way into the world. I was determined and very independent. In the years of middle school I was a cheerleader because I was told that I could never do that. I also had 2 paper routes to complete and I helped raise my sister.
I have raised my sister since my mother left us that year and I will tell you that I believe that my mother could not have done a better job then I did. My sister has hit her ruff spots in life but I have and always will be there for her. She is just 5 years younger than me but she still calls me Mom every time that we talk. It breaks my heart that my mother was so sick that she didn’t want to see what she was missing out on. But I stand proud of the good job that my father and I have done with her.
As the years have gone on I know that my mind changed a million times on what I wanted to do when I grow up, and yet my father never told me no!!! My mother on the other hand has been wandering in and out of my life for years and told me that I would never have anything and be a dead beat loser!!
So here we are present day… I graduated high school maybe not top of my class but I did get my diploma. As soon as I finished school I moved to Florida and got a place with my future husband and we lived down there for about a year until he finished getting his motorcycle repair certification. Then we moved back here to Rhode Island and I went to college. I finished my massage therapy certification and then decided that I did not want to do that just yet. I worked a full time job and started a motorcycle shop just like I told my father years ago. Most of my life was spent advertising and selling the business. I will tell you it was hard and there where many times when I wanted to give up but I also wanted to prove my mother wrong all the time. After about 2 years of working hard for someone else and getting the shop up and running to my standards, I went out and bought my tanning salon. Why you ask because I must be crazy!! But I hated working for someone else. To top it off after having the salon for a year I decide that I still was not satisfied with myself or the things that I could do. I went out and got a job working on a high rise building in my town. I’m the executive administrative assistant for the office and I’m the only female on site. This leads to some very interesting times but all are good.
As I have said I work about 15 hours a day from the AA job to the salon to the shop and to the house to make dinner, do laundry, clean house and last but not least pay my bills. All in all my days are busy and very eventful! I love it and I hate it at times but as I said these are the things that make a person.
I take each day one at a time. I have the things that I have always wanted and do what I want, when I want to! I also believe that I’m bored and ready for a change in my life. Maybe it is about time that I start planning my wedding!
So in Closing I know that my page states that I work hard but as you can tell I just want to! I chose to, and I can stop at anytime. Thanks for reading this and remember never let anyone tell you that you can’t do it. Just reach for the stars and take each day as they come.
Lots of love to those brave enough to read this.