Before I get to the point where I turn away from Spark completely bc I'm THAT ashamed of myself, I'm getting myself to blog. Because when I blog I put it out there, almost like challenging myself to get out of the nasty funk that I'm in.
I'll try to sum it up:
- hit my GOAL beginning of September!
- mid-September started slipping, not logging food, not exercising as much. But I blogged to get myself to get ON TRACK!
Of course then I have all the excuses in the world for why I didn't get on track:
- Hub started a new job and I had to cut back on working out to get home with the dogs
- went out of town 2 weekends
- got SICK which really screwed me up
- SLAMMED at work with projects
- generally EXHAUSTED
Annnnnd the ultimate excuse to completely fall off the planet:
- I gave up a HORRIBLE addiction and I am in DETOX mode right now. It's been since the weekend and I feel, in a nutshell, like CRAP.
I know it will get easier with each day that goes by, but with this detoxing comes a huge craving for all things bad - soda, candy, sweets, salt. You name it, I want it.
So, please, I'm sorry for not returning messages, comments, hugs. I think about Spark every day, knowing I need to get back. Get in touch with my buddies, keep you posted. But I guess the shame kept me away. And I'm just putting it out there bc I will NOT let this get the best of me. I just needed a few weeks/days to get myself together, shake it off.
To make things worse, I have the Long Beach Half Marathon that I was so excited for and am now so completely nervous about. I'm going to try my best but I don't count on any PRs this time.