Personal Blog - "about Liars" - please reply

This is just something I feel the need to get off of my chest. I have this friend, I should say fake friend. We have know each other for over 7 years. In the past year we got very close spending a ton of time with one another. I started fallen for him. I am the type of giving, selfless person. So every time he was struggling or running low on cash I was there to help. Yes I know I am one of those dumb girls, that lets her self get taken advantage of from others.

Well I have spent in a year not hundreds but thousands of dollars on this BOY. I have been slowly pulling away from him but it is so very hard for me.

Well he lies to me contently. He was seeing a girl and he never told me. So here I am giving him money to help with bills and he's taking this girl out to dinner and movies, and paying for it all. When I can sit here and tell you he has spent $19, yep you read correctly only $19 dollars on me our entire friendship!! I also found out that he took her to New York for her birthday and paid for every last thing.... from the flight to the food.

Why do people take advantage of the individuals who do things with their hearts, because they are the ones who care so much for them. Why do people not see when they are hurting someone who loves them.

You know on top of all this, to my face he is all I love you, your the greatest, you are so perfect, the only thing he says is bad about me is my self esteem. Which I have learned if you have low self esteem do not date!!! You will be taken advantage of, men know how to use that against me. My sons father did the same thing. Well behind my back he tells his friends, sister, and even his mother, that we are not friends, that I am crazy, and that I am obsessed with him.
When he is the one who looks for me! I no longer call him, he has to call me. I have backed away so much, but I am not done yet.

I don't know what it is....... hope, maybe that may be it!!! That he truly could be the friend I saw. This is really hard, he is such a great actor. When we are together I believe he really is my friend.

Another thing I just got him a job, that pays him 2 times as much. I am not even over exaggerating really 2 times as much. And he took his family out to celebrate with two of his friends and did not even invite me. When he goes to the movies with me, he tells his family that he is going with his girlfriend, he says her name.

I have never and I mean never done anything wrong to him. In the beginning he would call me stressed and I would help him at the drop of a dime. He hides me and our friendship, and tries to tell me he does not. He just recently told his girlfriend that he has not spoken to me in weeks.......when the job I helped him get is with me. I talk to him everyday.

Now he just bought her an engagement ring and will be proposing to her today (they have only been dating 4 months)! And its funny but I believe that is my money that is paying for it!!! The past 6 months I have been helping him by paying his motorcycle for him because he was really struggling at his last job. But wow out of no where he now can afford to buy a 3 diamond (nice sizes at that) engagement ring.

I hate being such a nice (naive) person. I want to learn to be a Bit*&!! But that is just not who I am, and I pray that not everyone takes advantage of extremely nice people. But my luck has already handed me the only two men that have been close to me have. First my sons dad now the boy who came after him. How could I be so lucky to get two in a row and at that the only two I have ever had????

I know I am dumb and brought a lot of this on myself but he is still wrong for taking advantage of me. I swear I am trying to pull away, I just do not know why I even want to be his friend. He is nothing a friend should be..... Nothing like me!