Thinking about me for the first time in a long time!
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Life the past few months has been less that perfect. My husband and I have recently separated. I'm thinking divorce - He's thinking I'll come back and life will go back to normal.
My life, or what used to be my life, is no more. Everything is different. I now find myself with a lot of silence and time to think....and oddly enough, time for myself. At first I wasn't really sure what to do! This is the first time in 7 years that I've only had to think about me.
Several thoughts are swirling around in my head. Some are very positive - this is a new start, I deserve this, I deserve more that what I was getting, I'll have time to go back to school, time for the gym, time to focus on my career, time to shop, basically, just time to do whatever I want to do!!
Sadly though, after 7 years of worrying and caring about someone else - I don't know what I want.
I've learned that I'm co-dependent. I'm sure that plays a big part in my eating habits and weight gain and loss over the years. When this was first brought up I was so offended! I was NOT co-dependent! But, I definitely am...and it's okay! I can fix it - I can do this!!
Anyway - I'm back on Spark and I'm hoping that it will be a positive outlet for me! I need to fill my life with positive things and look forward to new beginnings!