I shampooed myself in Protein drink
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Ok, so I had another really bad day. It reminds me of the book Alexander and the really horrible day. I remember reading it to my kids when they were little and today I lived it.
It started off that I stayed in bed until 9 am. I am not a late sleeper and that for me is late. Then I sat in my living room drinking my coffee and putting my shopping list together. My youngest was in the room with me. Then the oldest came in the room. She was copping an attitude and I told her to leave the room if that was the way she was going to be. Well, she gets dressed and was ready to leave with her own agenda for the day not planning on checking with me that her plans were ok with me or Dana. She was going to blow off my youngest to go see the Boyfriend right away. 15 minutes earlier she was a bear in the living room and now she is off to the the BF. Well, I flipped. I told her that if the boy was too disrespectful to come to our house that I was not going to let her go to his house every day. She has issues that she needs to talk with him about and pretending that the does not hate us is not going to go away. Many things were said and I felt bad. But this is the makings of an abusive relationship and they have only been going out 3 months. Really scarey how this boy in that short a period of time has alienated my daughter from her friends and family. I told her I was not telling her to break up with him, but She needed to talk to him.
She left with her sister to drop the guitar off to him and to go see her grandmother. I grabbed my protein drink and headed out the door.
I am not really sure what happened next, but the drink flipped up in the air and I ended up wearing it. and my bag wore it. My shoes wore it. My hair was covered. I was on the way to the gym and had 15 minutes to get there for my one on one training session. So I clean up the mess a little and rinse some of the drink out of my hair and flew out the door.
I cried the whole way to the gym. Wishing my mom was still here to comfort me and to let me know that I was not being unreasonable with my daughter. I was thanking God that I have Amy, cause I don't know what I would do with out her. I was a mess. When the trainer pulled me aside at the gym she brought me in her office and made me spill my guts. She hugged me and wanted me to cry and I told her that I have a hard time letting it flow. When my Dad was dying I was not allowed to cry. He would not stand for it. He could not handle it. I learned to repress tears. The tears started flowing. She put me on the arch and i burned 500 calories and then she had me work out with Aims. Aims was really good. Because she did not have to share her training time with me, but she did. I cried while we were working out. I was just so sad between the stuff with my MIL and the stuff with my daughter.... ugg.
Well she broke up with him today. I am not thrilled that she did that because she did not face her troubles head on. She broke up with him and now there will be resentment toward me. I do not want to be the blame for it.
The day is done. I had a good work out. I ate a great meal that my husband made me. And I am having desert tonight.
Tomorrow is a new day. I am looking forward to hanging with little people. Even if one of them is 4.