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Negative People generate Negative Feelings

Monday, April 06, 2009

Maybe some people think that I am sickeningly sweet. That my half full glass mantra is sappy. But those are the people that I am writing about today. The people that you have around you that have negative. People that find your success threatening and feel the need to zing you so that they feel better about themselves. Is it a defense mechanism?
I have learned over the past 20 years to hold my tongue. Not to say something that i feel would hurt others feelings. To put my feelings aside instead of asserting myself if it means that I can avoid a conflict. Maybe if I say nothing, give a look, and think it inside someone will can read my mind. I found that it does not work. That in fact my looks could be misconstrued the wrong way and cause more problems for me. Anyway, I have been working on this. So... Here is my blog story...
I belong to a gym with my sister in law. We both did the biggest loser challenge and saw great success with it. Actually amazing success. Lately we have gotten so close that we both reach for the phone at the same time to call each other, or have the same thoughts and we really are in sync with each other. Almost eerie in sync. I actually am teetering on the idea that we can almost read each others minds. So when we finished the biggest loser challenge we were pumped to join the follow up advanced course on weight training. Our own boot camp. It was 80 dollars for 4 weeks, 2 classes each week. 8 people max in the class so the instructor can give us each individual attention. It sounded great!!! Our trainer has the biggest heart. God bless her. She would do anything for us. She would. So I am blessed to have 2 really positive people around me that lift me each week in this journey to a healthier me.
Sometimes you can't help who is around you. One of the women in our class is negative. I warned Aims... And sure enough I confronted this woman this week; she said something to another gym member i found it offensive. I told her that if she had said that to me I would have left the class. But since i am working on expressing myself instead of holding the feelings in, i told her how I felt. Well, she did not like what i said and threw me and Amy under the bus. She told on us to the trainer. HOW OLD ARE WE?(43 and 42) This is so 25 years ago. LOL! Yesterday I was talking to my trainer and told her how I felt about this persons negative attitude and just what I told this woman. (not knowing she had already talked to the trainer) I saw an "A Ha moment!" ON the trainers face. She said that she had heard a totally different account of my story that was a little twisted. I am so done with this. I am there to get in shape with Aims and to be a healthier me. I am not hanging with the other girl because she is negative and thrives on that stuff.
I vow to think positive and to continue my journey of non scale accomplishments that will eventually add up to scale victories.
We all have a choice. To lift people up or to step on them. I will only be a doormat if i lay down and let people walk on me. That is not going to happen. I choose to surround myself with good people. Positive people. Although we all have our moments, where we let doubt and negative thought creep in, the positive people that I associate with will lift me up instead of keeping me down.
Here is to a positive day!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    POSITIVETY ALL THE WAY!!! emoticon Be encouraged.
    4386 days ago
    Sunny, happy, positive people are a joy to be around. They make me feel sunny and happy and positive. Negative people quickly pull me down and I sure don't need that (I can do tha on my own just fine, thank you!) I am glad that you have Amy to surround you with positivity (is that a word?) And I am sorry that you have a negative woman in class with you. Maybe the trainer will speak to her about it now that she knows the whole story. Either way, I wish you all the positive people your life can hold!
    4387 days ago
    It is important and empowering to stand up for yourself and/or someone else when another person is being offensive,( especially if the gym member who was being "accosted" was unable to do it herself) It's too bad to have such an unhappy person in a class with only 8 people....makes it hard to avoid. Good for you for speaking up, backing up the other class member AND letting the offender know what's what. Good .luck with your positive journey!
    4387 days ago
    You did the right thing... especially if she said something that offended you!
    4387 days ago
    Good for you! I feel the same way. I had a negative moment and a dear friend with a positive spirit helped me through it to come out better on the other side. I only surround myself with positive people and try to be one myself. But you're right, sometimes you can't help who you have to be around. Kill them with a kind, positive attitude. It's the best payback ever!!
    4387 days ago
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