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#93: Happy Sadness

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Yesterday I experienced happy sadness.

All day I felt terrific, enthused and energized. I listened to gospel music most of the day and received a feeling of well-being and acceptance. The day was a happy one. Then I answered a post and had the happy sadness arrive. I began thinking of my dad who died at the young age of 48. Then I remembered fun times with my mother and other relatives. I'm sure you've done the same thing. We all have memories of those we loved.

While in this happy sadness state, a group member sent me a link to the gospel song "In the Garden" which brought on a flood of tears. Happy sad tears that flowed down my face as I recalled opening Dad's Bible after he died and finding that song's lyrics on a piece of stationery folded inside at the 23rd Psalm.

I never knew Dad as a religious man. That discovery was a pleasant surprise.

As I played that song over and over on a continuous loop, emotions I must have still held inside found a release. Yes, I miss him, as I do my other relatives and friends. But I was happy for him, too. Whatever your beliefs or non-beliefs, having hope is a precious thing to hold on to, especially when you're lying on a stretcher in a hospital knowing you have only minutes to live.

Anyway, that was last night. This morning I played the song again, had only a few tears and realized that often, many years after a loss, our grief will appear, unbidden, and make us happy sad.

If you've read any of my previous messages, you know I have not gotten very personal in these blogs. Instead, I have tried to inspire, encourage and support readers. I have tried to show true compassion and understanding. But today's message begged to be written, if for no other reason than as a cathartic release.

If you experience sadness over a lost loved one, please know that happy sadness is a good thing. Embrace it and feel the pent-up love for your lost relatives or friends. Cry if you want, but let go of the grief that frequently maintains a hold on us long after our loss. Until, that is, something as insignificant as a song helps bring the grief to the surface and allows us to appreciate happy sadness.

Be well. Have a blessed week.

* * * * *

"The word ‘happiness’ would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness." Carl Jung
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I enjoyed reading this post and how well you said it, it makes perfect sense ... Happy Sadness. Thank you for sharing.

    Hugs and Love~Taffi emoticon
    4166 days ago
    Thank you, Lou for sharing with us. I know that feeling.... emoticon
    4169 days ago
    4169 days ago
    I got goose bumps reading your blog today, made me think of my Dad, who I lost many years ago and my other departed loved ones. I don't cry as much as I did the first year but every now and then something will stir up the tears of missing them and sometimes smiles of happy memories. Thank You for sharing these personal thoughts.
    4169 days ago
    Oh yes, I know exactly what you are saying. Thank you for sharing this in terms that make sense.

    Blessings to you;
    4169 days ago
    I relate to your experiences over the last couple days, my friend.

    4169 days ago
    Happy sad here too, lost my dad just over a year ago, but he is in heaven and I will see him again, so happy happy sad! emoticon
    4169 days ago
    I know exactly what you mean. My Dad's name was Ray, and when I see the sun shining in rays I always think of him and sometimes I cry, other times I'm just happy to have the memories. I will miss him until the day we meet again.

    4169 days ago
    What a wonderful thought it must have been to realize that you will see your dad again someday. Add a little more happy to your happy sad
    4169 days ago
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