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Some friends think I'm overdoing it...

Thursday, January 07, 2010

I am just so disgusted with myself that I actually weigh more than 2 of the contestants on this seasons Biggest Loser. I know that I shouldn't compare myself to them, but still, come on. It has just lit a fire under my bummy and I want to lose this weight once and for all! So this week, I've been pushing myself to workout hard. Some friends worry about me, and have voiced their opinions, that I am overdoing things. I really don't think I've overdone anything. I've been working out consistently for a while, but this week, I've stepped it up a notch...trying to find that trigger to get past this darn plateau that I've been on for months now.

When I was in high school, I wore a size 18 and weighed 180 pounds. I'm almost 35 now, and I am once again in a size 18, but weighing in at 240 pounds! So yes, I do understand that there is quite a bit of muscle difference from then to now, but still, the bottom line is that I weigh 240 pounds and that just disgusts me! I went to the gym this morning (had a 45 minute time limit as I had to be somewhere else at a certain time) so I set a goal to ride the stationary bike for 5 miles, and whatever time was leftover, I would work on the punching bag and speed bag. I did my 5 miles in just under 14 minutes! So I had 30 minutes on the bags! In just an hour, I am heading back to the gym for the 90 minute fitness bootcamp session.

I do not see this as overdoing it....just pushing myself to see what I really can do. And pushing myself just a bit more than usual to try and jumpstart some weightloss. I have also increased my calories and am really trying to follow the nutrition plan that my diet counselor gave me almost a year ago. Hopefully, this will be what I need to start seeing some results. I'm so tired of people telling me that I look good when I don't feel like I look good. I have a friend that weighs 162 pounds....she actually thought I only weighed about 20 pounds more than her! Her jaw dropped to the floor when I told her what I actually weigh! That is most people's reactions.....but I don't know if they are serious or just patronizing me. If I am not down at least 5 pounds at my next official weigh-in (in a week and a half) I am seriously going to cry...cause I don't know what else to try.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I am so impressed by your self discipline! You have to be your own best friend sometimes. Often, friends mean well when they tell us we are overdoing it, but at the same time their comments come from a place of insecurity. They feel that because they aren't as committed to their health or have as much time to dedicate to it, you shouldn't either.

    As long as you don't develop dangerous symptoms: low blood sugar, dizziness, "headrushes", or blood pressure problems - then don't be afraid to go for it. I had a year after my forth child where I would sometimes log in up to four hours of exercise a day (never all at once, and the activities varied from Zumba, walking, spinning, kickboxing - whatever maintained my interest.) It wasn't all about the weight loss. It was often about peace of mind - the tranquility of being outside my house doing something good for myself.

    Our bodies are sacred gifts from God - our personal temples. We are not only meant to take care of them, but obligated. Just remember there should be a balance: mind, body, & spirit. Also, I have heard many women echo your feelings about being "disgusted" with their bodies, but try and remind yourself that we are beautiful in the eyes of the Lord. I believe he wants us to learn to love ourselves despite our defects whether they be on the inside or the outside.

    I love your posters! You are blessed to live in such beautiful surroundings! Don't forget to read a lot about nutrition. The food pyramid is NOT a very substantial guide to eating. There are many terrific books out there these days that have changed the way I think about eating and food. If we are not eating well, all the exercise in the world won't help. Good luck on this journey. You can do it!
    3962 days ago
  • CARLA393
    I do pretty "intense" workouts, as one sparkfriend told me the other day. So what you're doing seems perfectly fine to me. Make sure you're eating plenty though! I also read an article a while back that if you are in a plateau, you should drink extra water. Supposedly that's going to help. I don't know, I haven't plateaued yet, so I haven't had to try it. Even if you don't lose those stubborn pounds, keep at it. Our ultimate goals are to become healthy! If your body isn't used to all the activity it might hold onto some of that weight for a while, that's why they say to give it a few weeks to get used to the routine and then check your progress. I hope that stubborn fat leaves soon for you though!
    3979 days ago
    I wouldn't worry about overdoing it after watching what some of those Biggest Loser contestants go through!
    3980 days ago
    How is it that I'm first to add a comment to your very personal and poignant blog. I think what you're doing is great. I think you should talk to someone who is an expert in the weight loss field regarding exercise. (that isn't me)

    Your goals and motivation sound really good. I guess I would ask you to ask yourself it what your 'people' are saying to you is true? Really take a minute to sit down with yourself and reflect clearly on what has been said to you and hear what your heart says about the answer. "Is it true that I am _________ as __________says I am?

    Good luck, my heart goes out to you.

    Julie emoticon
    3980 days ago
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