Some friends think I'm overdoing it...
Thursday, January 07, 2010
I am just so disgusted with myself that I actually weigh more than 2 of the contestants on this seasons Biggest Loser. I know that I shouldn't compare myself to them, but still, come on. It has just lit a fire under my bummy and I want to lose this weight once and for all! So this week, I've been pushing myself to workout hard. Some friends worry about me, and have voiced their opinions, that I am overdoing things. I really don't think I've overdone anything. I've been working out consistently for a while, but this week, I've stepped it up a notch...trying to find that trigger to get past this darn plateau that I've been on for months now.
When I was in high school, I wore a size 18 and weighed 180 pounds. I'm almost 35 now, and I am once again in a size 18, but weighing in at 240 pounds! So yes, I do understand that there is quite a bit of muscle difference from then to now, but still, the bottom line is that I weigh 240 pounds and that just disgusts me! I went to the gym this morning (had a 45 minute time limit as I had to be somewhere else at a certain time) so I set a goal to ride the stationary bike for 5 miles, and whatever time was leftover, I would work on the punching bag and speed bag. I did my 5 miles in just under 14 minutes! So I had 30 minutes on the bags! In just an hour, I am heading back to the gym for the 90 minute fitness bootcamp session.
I do not see this as overdoing it....just pushing myself to see what I really can do. And pushing myself just a bit more than usual to try and jumpstart some weightloss. I have also increased my calories and am really trying to follow the nutrition plan that my diet counselor gave me almost a year ago. Hopefully, this will be what I need to start seeing some results. I'm so tired of people telling me that I look good when I don't feel like I look good. I have a friend that weighs 162 pounds....she actually thought I only weighed about 20 pounds more than her! Her jaw dropped to the floor when I told her what I actually weigh! That is most people's reactions.....but I don't know if they are serious or just patronizing me. If I am not down at least 5 pounds at my next official weigh-in (in a week and a half) I am seriously going to cry...cause I don't know what else to try.