Saturday, April 10, 2010
Hi my name is Cheridene and I am ADDICTED to unhealthy food.
I came out of my denial yesterday and realized that i am addicted to unhealthy food.This realization came about when i got home yesterday from the shops and realized that i had just used the last of my money for unhealthy food and then i proceeded to eat 6 chocolate mousse buns,1x2 l cola and R30 worth of boerewors in 2 hours.What makes it worse is that i have a kitchen full of healthy and fresh food.
I realized that i was on a high of sorts! i felt sick and so tired. So i passed out at 6pm and woke up this morning at 5am. I truly realized what i had done.
I have been addicted to unhealthy food since i was child.I was taught that if i did good things i would be rewarded with sweets and unhealthy treats. I was also taught to finish all my food on my plate to get dessert.I have carried that with me all my life.In my teen years i realized that junk food was a way to reward myself or to use to suppress or take away any bad emotions i was feeling.Now in my early adult years i am using unhealthy food as a companion and to combat boredom.
I have searched my mind as to why i don't want to eat healthy and i realized that i am using unhealthy food as a escape and to numb emotions.
I know i am addicted because as soon as i wake up i am thinking about eating unhealthy.I was doing well for awhile by having smoothies for breakfast and salads for lunch,but as soon as it came time to think about supper i would be buying these unhealthy foods.
I don't want to be addicted to anything that can harm me!! I want to have a healthy eating lifestyle and a healthy life.
So i will be treating my unhealthy food addiction as per any addict would treat an alcohol , cocaine or gambling addiction. I am going to find steps in dealing with my issues and develop coping and new eating lifestyle. This addiction is a psychological one and a physical one . I am going to find a group on the internet as East London does not have place that deals with food addiction and i know that Sanca is full enough.
I am not going to let this addiction rule my life anymore.