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Mama drama

Friday, September 17, 2010

Well for those who do not know me, my name is Sandy and I was raised by my Grandmother (father's mother) from the time I was 5. My Dad was a uneducated truck driver and my mom skipped town when I was very little. She appears every so often to bring all kinds of unwanted drama into my life. She is presently going through her 4th divorce and is living with her sister and her family because she has no money, no job and has been living there for a year. She is really a piece of work. The few times I have tried to have a relationship with her she has done things like tell me she had to hock her jewellery for gas money, i give her money to get her stuff in hock and on that same day she says" lets go out for seafood I am buying". That was when i was 21 and working 2 jobs while putting myself through college. She spent all of the money I had in savings taking people out to eat and I do not know what ever happened to her jewellery. That is just one instance of my Mama drama.

Well yesterday I get a call from my sister (who by the way is exactly like my mom). Because my family and I have a large home and both have good jobs my mothers family decided that she should live with me. WHAT!!!!! My mother is in the hospital and they think she has cancer. I know it sounds mean but she is NOT LIVING WITH ME! She has sticky fingers, does not curb her mouth around my kids, smokes like a chimney in the house (which we do not permit in the house), lies constantly even over the price of bread, and is overall not a nice person. My older sister who cheated on her husband like 7 times, who is now in a 4 month relationship with a man who has been married 3 times already and getting a divorce said her house is to small because her boyfriend and his kids live with them and when she gets her kids she does not have room.

My mother is causing marital problems for her sister and her husband because she is lazy and will not even clean up after herself. They want to pawn her off on someone because they can't handle her behavior or mouth anymore and they are out of options. They do not want to kick her to the street but no one wants to take on the responsibility of a 58 year old woman, with a foul mouth, bad attitude and brings a dark cloud wherever she goes.

Dang I think I need a drink just recalling the last 24 hours! I am stuck. I was raised in church by my Grandmother and Grandfather. You know that whole honor your father and mother thing but I am having trouble. If it was my Grandmother I would take her in and do everything I can for her but this woman who gave birth to me and my sister and disappeared for years without a word is another story. When I was a teenager I started seeing her once or twice a year but I still do not see her as my Mom. UGH What to do, what to do! I am so confused over it all.

I know if I move her in with me it would cause problems for my family. I am so pulled over what is right for my family and what my sense of obligations is.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • HSS1970
    I hope you have NOT let your mother move in with you. Your top priorities should be your marriage and your kids - it sounds like your mother would wreak havoc on both!
    3855 days ago
  • SARAHBBROWN
    I don't know you, but want to offer my advice. Do not let her move in. If you can offer a hundred a month or something and help to find her an apartment. You do not need an additional burden, mother or not. It doesn't appear as though she did all that well for you! Really she is an adult and needs to figure it out herself.
    Hope I haven't been too annoying adding my comment!
    3860 days ago
  • SPARKVAMPY2012
    Oh my gosh! I think we are related! I have a very simialr situation going on constantly. Know that you are not alone. I can totally relate to what you are saying. My advice would be NOT to let her move in, especially if you KNOW she will cause problems. Just my 2 cents though. Im here if you need to talk . Hope it gets better for you! And remember to take care of yourself.
    3860 days ago

    Comment edited on: 9/17/2010 10:58:15 AM
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