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It's time to let it out...

Friday, October 01, 2010

Back in July I had a BIG scare which I thought was my heart. Since then I have been through numerous tests and procedures. The doctors still aren't sure what is wrong.

Through all of the testing that has been done, a precancerous polyp was found and removed. I thank God that the testing lead to finding that. Had I waited until I was 50 to have a colonoscopy done, it may have been full blown cancer. Please, please, please don't put off having screenings done that are meant to save our lives.

In the last 2 weeks I've had two surgeries. One to remove a cyst from the bottom of my foot and then a week ago I had my knee scoped. As a result of the surgeries, I ended up with two blood clots and have been on bed rest for a week now, along with injections, blood thinners and major pain killers. I never knew blood clots caused so much pain. I had a doctor appointment today and have been cleared to start physical therapy on Monday thank God. These blood clots have really hampered my knee recovery.

Yesterday, thanks to Obama shutting down the space program my husband was working on, my husband was laid-off.

I am trying to see the blessings in my life, but right now I'm having such a hard time. I am physically, emotionally and spiritually drained. I don't think I can take one more thing happening to us. I feel so helpless. I can't walk without crutches, I can't drive, I can't even bathe myself by myself.

Forgive me for not being a better friend. My plate has been full and running over. I appreciate so much the love and concern that has been given to me.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    So sorry to hear about all your troubles. I read about your gallbladder first so I know you are having a tough time. I just had mine out plus a hernia repair in Nov. so I know how that feels. Will be praying for you. love and hugs, B
    3584 days ago
    My thoughts an prayers are with you. I dropped off for a while with my own family crisis since June. So i have not been following your blog like I used to. I wish you an easy recovery but from experience it can be a long recovery with blood clots. I managed to clot my whole left leg 3 years ago and the pain is excruciating. I had to take the blood thinners for almost 2 years to clear the clot. The worst part was the once a week trip to the dr to have your levels checked and when you are trying to eat healthy but have so many restrictions on the vegetables you can eat while on blood thinners is ridiculous. So I am sending you all my happy thoughts and prayers!
    3626 days ago
  • SANDY044
    Oh Sarah, I haven't been on spark in so long.I had no idea of all that you were going through! I want to let you know you will be in my thoughts and prayers! {{hugs}}
    3629 days ago
    Sending good thoughts and wishes your way. You always have motivation for everyone else, and such a terrific spirit, and I sincerely hope that you're receiving some of the good you send out.
    3666 days ago
    My darling....my prayers are with you and hubby....I don't have more to give from this distance apart to ask what you need me to do to help get you through this time.....
    3671 days ago
    I don't know you even as a SparkFriend but I don't have to in order to understand the feelings you're struggling with. Things do seem overwhelming when we're smack in the middle of them & it sometimes seems like it takes every fiber of our being to hang on & even move forward in a positive way.

    I will add my prayers to everyone else's because I believe in a God who hears, loves, acts in EVERY situation. My heart goes out to you & your husband.

    I'm glad that you're able to start therapy this coming week ~ a positive in the midst of the turmoil. As for you not being "here" .... any real friend cares more about your circumstances than your ability to "keep up" in a cyber world.

    emoticon emoticon
    3673 days ago
    Sarah, do what you must to take care of you... I'm sending you spark mail now. Know you're loved and appreciated...

    3673 days ago
    This brought tears to my eyes!! Hon, I came to check on you to see how you were doing on your journey because I felt like I haven't communicated with you in forever, and when I started reading this blog my jaw dropped! I will be praying for you and your husband. Stay strong! I will be thinking of you often.
    3675 days ago
    Oh my Goodness!!! I just dropped in to see how you were doing and read your blog! AARRGH. It looks like Job had nothing on you! I'm so glad I came by. You will be daily in my prayers at 8AM each day, Central time. We'll also pray that your husband finds work soon.

    All the beautiful things your friends have said I agree too. You are an inspiration, even now, as you insist on looking for the blessings in your life!

    Trust that those blessings will be revealed! This is the time when your faith and the faith of your friends counts most.

    Much love, emoticon

    3675 days ago
  • HEIDILEE1968
    Hi Sarah,
    I'm so sorry for all you are going through!! I understand about being drained from life's issues!! I've had health issues and my husband is laid off too so i can relate to your overwhelming stress and drainage.
    I'm here for you If you need to talk and you're in my thoughts & prayers!! Hugs,
    Heidi Lee emoticon
    3676 days ago
    betta days ahead soul sista... I promise. You are in the right place. you have supported and inspired many....let us return the favor! take time to take care of you. emoticon emoticon
    3676 days ago
    Gosh I've been gone for a while and wanted to see how you are doing. I'm so sorry Sarah for what you and your family are going thru right now. Thank goodness the cancer was detected early. I know things will get better for you. Just concentrate on healing yourself and the rest will work out. Best wishes and prayers.


    3677 days ago
    Chickadee, there's nothing for you to apologize for!

    You're going through an unthinkable amount of emotional and physical stress and worry right now. You've been missed, yes, but always in a "I hope Sarah's doing alright" kind of a way, not a "now why don't she post?" sort of way.

    Positive thoughts, good karma, gentle loving vibes - take your pick, from my heart to yours honey. Take your time to heal, to regain your health and light within you, and find your feet with the job situation (we're there now, too).
    3677 days ago
    seems like you have so much going on, I bet you dont even feel like yourself right now, I know bad times never last as well as good times, but when you have them snow ball at you it can make you feel so over whelmed and out of control, like you mentioned that you could have had blown out cancer, now that is a blessing! you msy not be able to see your blessings right now, just remember a gem is not polished without being rubbed .
    1 corinthians 10-13 God will not suffer that which ye are able, and it goes on to say he will make a way to escape, this may be a time when you discover something new in your life that you may have not noticed other wise.
    glad to hear you're started recovery, thats a good sign,

    I will keep you and your family in my prayers
    one blessing , besides your wonderful family, is your spark friends, when ever you need a shoulder or just feel like shouting it out we will be here.
    3677 days ago
    Wow Sara, I'm so sorry to hear about Chris's job and the struggles during your recuperation. I will be praying for all of you that you will come through this season quickly and stronger for it. I've missed you but totally understand all that has been going on. As for the blessings in your life - you and Chris are together for one and you have three terrific children. The blessings are there, sometimes it's just difficult to see them through the rain.

    emoticon emoticon
    3677 days ago
  • no profile photo CD6063397
    it's ok....SparkFriend...I too had a very bad year....but your not alone...hang in there --
    read the book---The Dream Giver)by Bruce Wilkinson (it's a easy read)...this will haep you....but your self back in the right attitude...I promise you will love it.... emoticon
    3677 days ago
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