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NOTMILK
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Reality

Friday, October 22, 2010

Just wanted to let all my Spark Friends know that even with the "perpetually sunny" exterior, things in my life don't always go the way I want them to, the way I planned or even ... well. As a matter of fact, bad things happen to me too. I just try VERY hard to look at them for what they are, moments in time.

This morning, literally seconds after posting my happy LALALALA status, I got the phone call from the oldest child (18). He was in an accident.



I know a few things:

I know that all of you are going to look at this and send your support. For that, I am truly grateful.

I know that car is a goner, and I am not even a mechanic.

I also know, that my son is alive. He is going to sit down and have dinner with me tonight and he is going to go to bed here at the house in his own bed.

I know the day was still beautiful because when I went to get lunch today, several hours later, I walked out side and the sun was still up and the birds were still singing. The day was still amazing.

I reminded myself that bad things are only bad things if you let them be. I am sure that this experience will be of value and is a good thing.

I am really curious though, what will come of this? What lesson does he need to learn? Or is there someone he is supposed to meet when he takes the public bus down to campus? Will he one day need this experience in his past to help him though a situation? I wonder what amazing things we will see because of this.

The Universe is full of surprises, you know. emoticon

With that thought out there, have an Amazing weekend. Smooch the people next to you, hold hands, love. Above all, appreciate everything.
emoticon

PS - thanks, in advance, for all the love and support that I know you will give me. You all are AWESOME!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • _RAMONA
    I was told recently that it's just not possible for me to be this darn positive ALL of the time... I think you'd be able to back me up on my position... YES! You are great, and I'm so glad your son wasn't hurt!

    {{{{{{{{{ HUGS }}}}}}}}}
    Ramona
    3329 days ago
  • GRANDMABEAST63
    Big hug, glad to hear he is ok. My girls are 17 & 19 and we constantly worry about car accidents. The main thing is that he is fine, and yes a car is a thing it can be replaced. Have a great weekend.
    3332 days ago
  • JRIMM4
    So glad to hear that your son was not hurt in the accident - not fun experiences. Loving your take on the day as a whole.

    JR
    3332 days ago
  • EUPHRATES
    SO glad he's okay!
    emoticon

    See, there's reasons you're one of my "Friday Friends" this week (don't know if you saw that yet).

    My mom was SUCH a worrier, that it was an amazing breath of fresh air to be around my first MIL, who taught me the phrase "no news is good news" - I'm much more likely to take a deep breath and say "Okay, what do we need to do?" in a crisis than panic. Go you for keeping things in perspective!
    3332 days ago
  • L8AGAIN
    Notmilk, I also have boys, ages 17 and 19. My 19 year old totaled our car when he was 17 but came out without a scratch, so I get where you are right now. Terrified and grateful.

    No one was in the car with our son. He was programming the GPS while driving, the road curved, he drove off the road and hit a tree. Thank goodness he was driving slowly. The accident taught both of my boys to never, never take their eyes off the road, not even for one second.they also learned that driving is a huge responsibility.

    He has since told us he will always remember our reaction to the accident; the tears in our eyes, and our just wanting to hug him and not let go when we got to the accident site. That we didn't seem to care that the car was a goner. All that mattered was that he was fine and learned something in the process. And we've never brought it up since. He has mentioned it, but we have not and for that, he is thankful. He has had to pay the difference in the amount that his car insurance went up after the accident.

    It sounds like your son will be taking away a huge lesson from his accident as well. He'll learn that first and foremost his mother loves him, there are consequences to his actions, and sometimes the consequences lead us in new directions we never could have imagined.

    I'll be thinking of you both.
    3332 days ago
  • L8AGAIN
    Notmilk, I also have boys, ages 17 and 19. My 19 year old totaled our car when he was 17 but came out without a scratch, so I get where you are right now. Terrified and grateful.

    No one was in the car with our son. He was programming the GPS while driving, the road curved, he drove off the road and hit a tree. Thank goodness he was driving slowly. The accident taught both of my boys to never, never take their eyes off the road, not even for one second.they also learned that driving is a huge responsibility.

    He has since told us he will always remember our reaction to the accident; the tears in our eyes, and our just wanting to hug him and not let go when we got to the accident site. That we didn't seem to care that the car was a goner. All that mattered was that he was fine and learned something in the process. And we've never brought it up since. He has mentioned it, but we have not and for that, he is thankful. He has had to pay the difference in the amount that his car insurance went up after the accident.

    It sounds like your son will be taking away a huge lesson from his accident as well. He'll learn that first and foremost his mother loves him, there are consequences to his actions, and sometimes the consequences lead us in new directions we never could have imagined.

    I'll be thinking of you both.
    3332 days ago
  • L8AGAIN
    Notmilk, I also have boys, ages 17 and 19. My 19 year old totaled our car when he was 17 but came out without a scratch, so I get where you are right now. Terrified and grateful.

    No one was in the car with our son. He was programming the GPS while driving, the road curved, he drove off the road and hit a tree. Thank goodness he was driving slowly. The accident taught both of my boys to never, never take their eyes off the road, not even for one second.they also learned that driving is a huge responsibility.

    He has since told us he will always remember our reaction to the accident; the tears in our eyes, and our just wanting to hug him and not let go when we got to the accident site. That we didn't seem to care that the car was a goner. All that mattered was that he was fine and learned something in the process. And we've never brought it up since. He has mentioned it, but we have not and for that, he is thankful. He has had to pay the difference in the amount that his car insurance went up after the accident.

    It sounds like your son will be taking away a huge lesson from his accident as well. He'll learn that first and foremost his mother loves him, there are consequences to his actions, and sometimes the consequences lead us in new directions we never could have imagined.

    I'll be thinking of you both.
    3332 days ago
  • NOTMILK
    All - thanks so much, you are great. Really.

    My mother-in-law taught me the phrase "It is only a thing" when I was newly married to her son and I broke a glass at her house setting the table for dinner. I was mortified. She was concerned that I might have cut my self. The glass... replaceable.

    As for wheels, until he has money for another car, he'll be walking or taking the Metro :) so think of him every morning and afternoon. We have some REAL wierdos on the bus here in Cincy - Imagine the stories he will have to tell at dinner.
    emoticon


    Colleen - thanks, he may need a ride to school. I am sure he'll call you. He hates the bus :)


    3332 days ago
  • ZURDTA-
    Wow... so glad your son is okay and when something like that happens, you just realise that 'things' don't matter - people do.
    3333 days ago
  • BARCLE
    omg - what's really got me buzzing about this (apart from the fact that he is okay etc - that's just a given that I'm happy about that) is the part where you wonder what's meant to happen from this - I think like this too! It's amazing imagining the possibilities and how things are just meant to happen. I usually find that even when bad things happen it always comes right somehow in the end even if I never find out how. My example of that is when my cat Oscar (who was my baby) died. He was hit by a train and I was totally devastated. I put it into a different perspective though - did he die in order that it saved it being another family member or a friend? (a little bit different thinking but then that's me at times)

    Enjoy the rest of your amazing day and dinner - Mr 18 may even let you give him that extra cuddle tonight emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3333 days ago
  • ANAJAK
    Your son is probably feeling pretty lucky right now - not just because the accident only wrote off his car but also because he has you for a mama :) I'm keeping this in my stash (just in case I'll need to be like you when my boy is 18)

    Glad you're all fine (except the car lol)
    3333 days ago
  • _DASH_
    wow. you are a breath of fresh air. i love your thinking.
    and you are right. the most important thing is everyone is alive. a car is just a thing.

    one time i was backing out of a parking space and not paying attention and i backed into someone's headlight who was coming behind me. when we all got out and i started profusely apologizing, the mom, dad and kid were ALL very quick to stop me and say, "are you okay? we're okay. it's just a thing. it doesnt matter. it's just a thing."

    i never forgot that, and it gave me great joy in the world to know how human we can be at times. i love this blog so much and i'm so glad your son is okay. and i hope he does meet someone who changes his life in some way on that bus, or wherever. you made my day with this blog.
    3333 days ago
  • _COSMOPAULATAN_
    Well, I am glad that you have a solid mindset. I'm not a parent, but I'd be a tough one if I was. I would either A) Ask him what he would like his consequence to be or B) Let him know that the next car he purchases is with his own money.

    Big hugs and support.
    3333 days ago
  • NEWLIFE422
    I'm so glad he is OK! I am here if you guys need me!
    3333 days ago
  • CITYGIRL27
    OMG I'm so sorry! You're 100% right that all that matters is that your son is okay and safe at home with you now - that makes it an awesome day.

    And, your outlook is AMAZING. I love the line about maybe there's someone he's supposed to meet on the bus... LOL. I'm sure he won't see it that way (for now at least!).
    3333 days ago

    Comment edited on: 10/22/2010 9:34:29 PM
  • UHYEAHABOUTTHAT
    Oh wow! I'm sorry he was in an accident, but I am so glad he's okay. I love your sunny exterior but I can't say I ever thought you were like, delusional with your happiness! No worries there, my friend!
    Your thoughts on your son's experience are interesting...like how you posted the question, who is he supposed to meet on the bus? (something liek that) That was a very good point. Weird, how everything fits together somehow.
    :) You ARE awesome and so is your son. :)
    3333 days ago
  • no profile photo GLORRE
    A happy attitude is half the battle!
    3333 days ago
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