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Thursday, January 06, 2011

I need help Spark Friends.

I love my boyfriend but he is a TERRIBLE influence on me.

How do you handle bad influences????

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Honestly, I just have to do my own thing and stick to what I'm good at.
    3640 days ago
    3645 days ago
  • no profile photo CD4429274
    It can be the boyfriend who brings home junk food. It can be the neighbor who drops off a dessert. It can be the co-worker who insists you "just try this."

    Or, it can be YOU who decides what you eat, when you work out, and how you get yourself healthy.

    I know which one I would pick. Do you?

    3645 days ago
    This IS difficult. My DH can be a good influence - when convenient for him or when he is in his loosing weight mode.. otherwise it is all up to me. I try and just focus on me and not worry about his dinners and work out because I need to on my schedule.

    It can be difficult eating out as well, but I try and stick to healthy menu items and not let DH's choices influence me.

    Best of luck! keep with it and push through!

    emoticon emoticon
    3645 days ago
    It's hard I know!! But if he loves you I think he should support you in your goals. Hugs!!
    3649 days ago
    I am very independent. I do my own thing. I always say, Life goes on with or without you. Good luck, Moni emoticon
    3657 days ago
    I loved reading what everyone wrote. I especially like the give him all the pizza and beer thing & Kick him out! emoticon

    As far as "if he loves you...." honey, if everyone interpreted a partners eating/exercising habits or lack of as not loving them, we would be in big trouble. I agree with the gal who wrote do you own thing.

    At the end of the day, your mouth, your body & your decision. emoticon
    3657 days ago
  • FREES1
    if he loves you and cares about and for you he'd give you the space to be healthy.
    put your goals ahead of your wants.. and find things to eat, or limit the pizza, and drink that will help you get to your goals while he follows his own way
    3657 days ago
  • ERIN4771
    you just have to keep doing what's right for you, and if he wants to join in, that's awesome, but until then, you can't let it affect you...besides, you are a strong, independent intelligent woman!!!!
    3657 days ago
  • no profile photo CD8689328
    I do my own thing. You can't change others. I share my personal expectations w/ my bf. He loves to eat out. Where as I dont.
    3661 days ago
    Does he know you put his pic here (is that really him) - it looks like something out of a commercial lol...

    I'm lucky right now because it's just me and my girls so I do what I want, when I want and eat how I want as I'm the 'influence' in the house.

    I have to figure out though what's most important... and once I get my shape back - I am NOT losing it for anyone!
    3662 days ago
  • no profile photo CD7942202
    If you ever figure it out let me know...I suck at it!!!
    3663 days ago
  • MARIE625
    In my case it's a husband rather than a boyfriend, but yeah - been there, done that! In the beginning, it was really hard, but at the same time, not so difficult. I was a little angry with him because he'd been bragging about loosing weight and how he was gonna get skinny bla bla bla and he kept nagging me to do the same. The minute I started, he stopped. That irritated me a little but his "you'll never loose weight" attitude seriously pissed me off. But, being the immature brat that I am, his poor attitude actually helped me dig my feet in and become more determined to loose the weight. Now, several years later, I'm actually a little disgusted by some of the food choices he makes. Just thinking about the calories & fat grams in some of the things he eats makes me feel slightly nauseous. Luckily, we've come to an "understanding" and rather than saying mean, snarky things to each other, we tease (in a loving way) about our food choices. He calls the bread I buy "bird food" because it has seeds on it, or he'll act all silly & excited when I buy him a package of sandwich meat. (I've become a vegetarian and he really, really, really misses eating red meat on a daily basis.) Still, it does take a lot of effort to stay focused on my goal. When hubby starts trying to get me to eat something I know I shouldn't, I try to remember to ask myself, "Do I want to have this cookie/cake/gallon of ice cream.... and be fat & miserable, or do I want to say 'No thanks' and be healthy & skinny." Nine times out of ten, I choose healthy & skinny.
    3663 days ago
    You make HIM eat all the pizza and drink all the beer so when you are lookin' fine and he looks like me, no girl will have him and you will have your pick of the skinny guys


    Not sure if that is what you had in mind, just a thought!


    SPark On!
    3663 days ago
    If I can I make them split a meal with me. But when I was in training for Hotter N Hell it was easy because I knew I would pay for it if I ate wrong.

    Good luck with this. I know it's hard with it a boyfriend because I found myself drinking more when I was with Fred.
    3663 days ago
    My bf is a terrible influence!!! Im still working on it! I work hard to think about my meals in advance and I have a mental picture of myself that I think of every time I want to make a bad decision!!!
    3663 days ago
    Kick him out???!!!!


    3663 days ago
    OMG!!!! That is so funny! I think knowing why I want to be healthy wins over the bad influences MOST of the time. I remind my self why I eat healthy and why I workout. and log on spark people what you eat and make it public so others can see it.
    3663 days ago
    Oh my gosh KIm, that picture is too funny (and scary too, lol!) How does one handle bad influences..that's a difficult one. I think one of the answers has to be mind-set. Going into situations with a plan, a mind-set of what the limits are going to be. Also whenever possible if you could (in advance) ask the person or persons to respect what it is you would like to keep a certain way. I really think it comes down to us, accepting or not accepting whatever is pushed at us. It's difficult I know. and I myself am just recently getting to finally be more under control in these situations. I don't want to disappoint people by being the one who has special needs but hey they'll get over it, and me I'll be slimmer and happier knowing I'm better in control of my own decisions. :)
    3663 days ago
    My BF is super fit, and can eat whatever crap he wants. Unfortunately that is what caught up with me - and I do NOT have his metabolism. He does body building, so he is constantly burning fuel. Lucky for me he does want to eat better, and this allowed me to make some changes.

    I took matters into my own hands and made a weekly dinner schedule. It's consistent and reliable and HEALTHY. If he wants a different dinner, he can make his own (but I don't see him doing that). Then when he goes to veg out on junk, I make sure I have some goodies for me (so I don't feel deprived) like Skinny Cow ice cream treats, weight watchers snacks, and low fat chocolate milk (hey, I read it's practically good for you, so I'm going with that). ;)

    Hope this helps, but I hope you find something that works for you. It's rather empowering to take control of the situation and make it work to your liking. I know I'm a lot happier since I did - and rarely have to have the dreaded "What should we have for dinner?" conversation, which was quickly followed by, "guess we'll have pizza.". Now that meals are predetermined, it makes grocery shopping so much easier, since I know what to anticipate each week.

    Good luck, my friend!
    3663 days ago
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