Monday, March 07, 2011
This past weekend was my college roomies weekend. Every year since 1994 we have all gotten together for our birthdays, since our birthdays are relatively close in days. This year, since it was so busy, we pushed it to this past weekend.
It has always been just the 4 of us. Laughing, carrying on...talking about our weddings (we were all each others' bridesmaids), children, husbands, etc. 18 years of just wonderful friendship.
This year, one of the girls was missing. She send us a long email that she would not be attending this years "Birthday weekend", because she no longer felt she was part of "this group". She had joined a different church and her life was different and just didn't see what she would have in common with us anymore.
The 3 remaining roommates (myself included) were DEVASTATED to say the very least. It was a complete shock, since not a week ago (in preparation for my arrival) we had all emailed about our arrival times and snacks we would bring, etc.
Another thing...how could she end a 20 year friendship....with an email? We were so hurt.
I had no idea how to respond. We went thru all the stages of grief...and I finally came up with an email that simply said, I was happy she was happy in her new found faith and that I would be there for her if she ever needed anything. I sent my love and signed my name.
I had so many things to share with my friend, so many hopes and dreams for my future and I couldn't wait to hear about her life this past year. She didn't wanna hear it, she didn't wanna tell me.
I understand that people change. I am a walking, talking, breathing example of that, but I can't imagine disconnecting from the people who helped "built me". I'm crushed.