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Why I Still Feel 250

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

When you are a certain weight (or around a certain weight) for a long time, you begin to identify with that weight - at least I have (can you tell, I put it my user name!) - even when I got as high as 280 I think in my mind I still thought, "well, that's just water weight, I'm really 250" - seriously.

Now that 20-some pounds are gone, I still feel like I'm 250 - and I still feel stuck - like I'm going to be at this weight forever - (but I'm not, I'm actually at my college summer weight but with a two-baby body).

I didn't realize that I had been thinking this way until I put a shirt on this morning - I feel like I'm swimming in it - I could easily smuggle my little boy under there, maybe even my toddler - even the arms on it feel looser - I haven't worn this top for a month or two, it has been hiding in my closet - but the last time I put it on it was kind of snug.

But my jeans feel so tight - um - wake up call Katie, you were wearing elastic waist pants and 20Ws when you started this - the jeans you have on right now are regular-sized 18s (and you can button your 16s even though it makes it look like you are running a bakery special - muffin tops 2 for the price of 1).

It is time to stop identifying with 250 and move on - there are better things to be and those things don't have numbers :)

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    It's strange because I don't really have a sense of my body size either. I know how I am doing based on the size I wear.
    I know I lost weight because it shows just about every where.
    But what is frustrating is that I am in a smaller size on top but I still can't get into smaller jeans. So I just continue to take deep breathes, remember that this is not a diet but a complete lifestyle overhaul and continue.
    I think you are doing great. I think weight loss should be gradual so that our perceptions of ourselves catch up to our body size.
    I wish you a wonderful journey and much success
    3306 days ago
    I CCCCOOOMMMPLLETTTELLYY identify with what you are saying. It is funny that I was at 270 pounds and said the same thing, "Im really around 250." Now I am in the 220's and everytime I make a mistake on this journey I expect the number 250 to stare back at me on the scale. I ultimately would like to get to 180 but before I can even get close to there, I have to get over this 250 pound weight on my shoulders.
    3306 days ago
    Here's to your wonderful progress and zeroing in on those "better things to be"
    3306 days ago
  • no profile photo CD10234260
    So true, I too have this self dismorphia thing going on....when I go to the store I automatically grab an XL without even thinking....even when I lost weigh before I still ran to the Xlarge sizes an sometimes even bought them because that's all I knew. This time, I'm really working on body image in my head because I don't think it's healthy to stay in the "FAT BRAIN"!! Have a great day and thanks for sharing! emoticon
    3306 days ago
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