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I am terrified of food

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

For the past week Food has become my obsession. This all started because i was upset about something (which will remain unsaid) for 3 days, i was so upset about it i couldn't eat. Even if i was hungry, my brain was telling me i had no appetite. At the end of the 2nd day i forced myself to eat something and I'm eating everyday again but even now it's still difficult to get back to a healthy eating habit, i know eating too little is just as bad as eating too much but I'm scared to eat more because eating reminds me of weight gain. Now I'm not saying I'm anorexic because I'm not, but since those few days my appetite just hasn't been the same and it's hard to meet my nutritional goals.

Something that makes things harder is my mom, she thinks i can eat a lot, even when i was eating normally, she makes high cal./fat meals and serves it on big plates, i remind her every day that i want a smaller plate, so i switch them out and try to control my portions. and i eat when I'm hungry i just haven't been very hungry lately, but unless I am using the food tracker wrong i seem to be under my goals for the past week.

One last thing that drives me crazy is not all restaurants have the nutritional value for their food so i have no idea how to track it, i try to find the closest thing to it on the tracker food search and estimate the portion....i just don't know how to handle food anymore and it terrifies me. I just started a 28 day exercise challenge so i know how important it is to get into healthy eating habits i want to do this right and i don't want to hurt myself physically or emotionally.

Advice and comments are more than welcome. emoticon
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