When are you expecting?

Ugh!!! Its been a few months since I was last asked the question and I had forgotten how much it hurts.
Today while touring a prospective resident at the retirement community where I work, she asked the dreaded question, "When are you expecting?" I didn't know what to say at first, so she repeated the question thinking I hadn't heard. I then politely told her I am not pregnant. I do carry a lot of weight in my stomach area, especially since my 2010 surgery it all seems to have moved to my belly. But man does it still hurt to be asked that question when you are not pregnant.

For me the question hurts in two ways. Obviously it hurts because I am so fat that people wonder if I am pregnant. It makes me wonder how many other people think I am, but never get the courage to ask. Do certain clothes make it worse than others? Other than losing the weight, what can I do to not get asked that again?

What hurts more than the weight is the fact that I would love to be pregnant and I would love to tell someone my due date. At 30 years old, I have no children and little chance of having children. I have always wanted to be a mom, but because of my weight and medical issues it has not beeen a possibility. I thought that at this point in my life I would be a stay at home mom with at least two kids and my photography business on the side. It doesn't help that my husband and I are more like roommates than husband and wife. Its been months since I have had any sort of affection from him. I have to ask for a hug because they are not given unless asked for. I kiss him and he doesn't kiss me back.
There is also the financial responsibility of having children. To be totally honest, we are broke. I work full time, plus have the photography business and yet there never seems to be enough money. Vick works around 20 hours a week, but usually less for minimum wage at the college bookstore and goes to school part time. We live in a rented house, that is more than we should be spending for housing. Then there are the other basics. So even though I would love to have a baby, it is just not the right time.

I guess hearing that question today brought up a lot of emotions. It does feel better to get it all out.