The fast food frenzy
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
I'm so frusterated right now. I just don't know what is going on with me. I eat so 'good' during the day and then night time comes and a frenzy comes over me! I feel like I NEED protien and grease, I think to myself; "hmmmm, I really want me a quarter pounder right now," and once that thought enters my mind it quickly becomes an obsession. I feel like I turn into some sort of mindless, anxiety prone animal. It's next to impossible for me to talk myself out of it because at that point I don't care about what I'm doing to myself. I only care about that fix and how great its going to be while I eat it. At times it feels like a panic comes over be because for some reason I'm terrified that if I don't eat that item I'll regret it and be so hungry later that I'll feel like I am going to throw up (f.y.i.,that's what I feel when I don't eat).
Tonight I seriously sat and obsessed about getting some fast food for like an hour. So, I left my warm comfy room to go out into the freezing Minnesotan cold to get it. Does that make logical sense? No! I was fighting myself to make the right decision (ya know, eat an apple or drink a bunch of water), yet I could not convince myself and I went to go get the food anyway. Now, I just feel guilty, sad and like I let myself down. I don't know what to do about it, or how to overcome these self proclaimed "frenzies."