So... that happened.

Almost a year ago (11 months and a day, not that I'm counting), I left my now ex-husband and moved into an apartment by myself. I had put on a little weight since my lowest (158), but I attributed it to the stress of preparing for a life on my own, and completely overturning my life. I figured once I got into a rhythm in my new place, I'd be able to focus on getting healthy and getting back in a routine that kept me looking and feeling fit and healthy.

I'm now heavier than when I started SparkPeople. I signed up in January 2008-ish at 205 lbs.

I'm 233 lbs right now.

Oddly enough, I'm not pissed at myself. I'm discouraged, sure, because I look like hell and none of my clothes fit anymore. I swore I'd never be one of "those people" - the ones that gained it back. No way - not me. But holy CRAP, is it easy. Way, way too easy.

I'm about to move again, at the end of the month. I hereby call on all of you to whip my ass come May 1 - because come hell or high water, I am going to start on the downward trend again. I'm single, and I'm not going to let myself date until I start making progress. I owe myself a better "me" than I am now, and I won't give a potential partner an incomplete "me" - that's not fair to either of us.

Forgive the babble. But I've hidden the fact that I've failed for way too long, and I saw the most success when I shared my life with my Sparklettes. So here I am, sharing a piece of me that's really painful (and IMO, ugly and lumpy and pasty and nasty). I'mma need y'all's help. Ok? Ok.