DH Can't Fish

TOTAL FAIL.

Follow up to my blog: Teach a Man to Fish with Food Choices www.sparkpeople.com/mypa
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My friends, tonight's tale is about how a dieter failed.

On Sunday, my husband asked me to help him with his diet. I'd be his 'nutritionist' for the next month, telling him what to eat for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Great! I get an opportunity to make food choices for DH! Something I'm sure many of us have wished for!

Yesterday, I picked all of his food choices, and guess what? He was full. No snack binges when he came home. He didn't even raid the pantry in the evening.

Seriously. No snacks before or after dinner.

Zero.

Today he was on a training course where they provided lunch. When he came home, I asked him what he had for lunch.

Any guesses? What kind of lunches would a company provide?



Bwahahaha! Yeah. No.



Pizza. Yes. Of course pizza.

I asked him how many slices. He said 3, maybe 4.

Ok, so it's 4.



I entered it into his food tracker. My jaw hit the floor.

Calories: 1469
Fat: 62g
Carbs: 163 (!!!)
Protein: 63g

The exchange went like this:

Him: (coming home, raids the refrigerator for snacks)
Me: Hey!! I'm making dinner here.
Him: I'm hungry.
Me: So...what did you have for lunch?
Him: Ummm. You're not going to like this. Pizza.
Me: (grumbling)

(We eat dinner. I go to enter his calories in the food tracker.)

Him: So how bad is the damage?
Me: (grumbling) Let me check. How big was the pizza?
Him: It was a medium.
Me: (skeptical) Are you sure it was a medium?
Him: Yeah, it wasn't a large.
Me: How many slices did you have?
Him: Ummm. 3, but maybe 4. I can't remember if I went back for a 4th.
Me: So it was a large, and you had 4.
Him: No! No! It was a medium and I had 3, maybe 4! I'm sure of it!
Me: (puts in 4 slices of large pizza)
Him: How bad is it?
Me: I'm quitting!
Him: It can't be that bad.
Me: 1469 calories! You just ate more calories at lunch then I've had the entire day! I ate 1275 calories. FOR THE WHOLE DAY!
Him: (laughing)
Me: You were supposed to have 80g carbs for the day, and you've had 210g.
Him: (laughing) But you said I needed more protein! I went for the meat pizzas! (laughing hysterically)
Me: (literal facepalm. Seriously. I facepalmed.)
Me: (pointing at the data) This is why you're fat.
Him: Ok, ok. Maybe I should go exercise.
Me: Exercise won't make up for this! You can't exercise away a bad diet!
Him: Exercise will help!
Me: If it helped, then you wouldn't be fat!
Him: Ok, ok.
Me: I quit!
Him: Awwww! I just had a bad day!
Me: If you keep doing this, then I'm ending this experiment because I can't undo what you're doing.
Him: Ok, I get it. Can I have a snack? I'm hungry.
Me: !!!!!
Him: Maybe some nuts.
Me: You wouldn't be hungry if you didn't have 163g carbs in 15 minutes! You spiked your insulin through the roof. That's why dinner didn't make you full, and why you still want to eat.
Him: (goes to the pantry and raids the nuts.)
Me: Admit it. My food choices were better. When you came home yesterday, you didn't raid the pantry for snacks. After dinner, you didn't go looking for snacks.
Him: (silence)
Me: Well?
Him: (pouting)
Me: Right? You weren't hungry.
Him: Ok, I get it!
Me: I quit!
Him: (laughing) Awww it was a bad day! I'll do better tomorrow!

Yeah, I know this cycle all too well. Been there, done that.

So yesterday's 'fishing' lesson didn't get through. Bwhahaha! You probably all knew that already.

Maybe I'll try wax on/wax off next.