I have started a 90 day challenge for myself!
I have learned in the past 3 months that I am an emotional eater. I don't have to be hungry but really need to be eating something. My main goto things are multi-grain cheerios (dry since can't have milk) and fruit or old fashioned popcorn.
Mom has developed dementia and it has truly been harder than I ever imagined. It came as such a shock because it just happened overnight. Hospice said it didn't sound like Alzheimers or dementia because it happened so suddenly. It could be mini-strokes or lack of oxygen since she is in final stage of COPD. May even be cancer that has gone to her brain that we didn't even know she had.
At this point, there is no sense in putting mom through testing to find out what the cause is. She is down to the last few weeks of her life so putting her through tests that will cause her more anxiety when there is nothing to be done is just useless.
I have been her caregiver for almost 2 yrs now. It has been so hard to handle her since she is now more like a 1-2 yr old that you have to keep an eye on ever y minute. It's been physically and mentally exhausting. Sleep is very scarce and sometimes in spurts of 15-30 minutes at a time. Ironically, sleep is one of the most important things for Fibromyalgia so my symptoms have been much worse.
My sister got here yesterday from NC to help. What a blessing!!!! I hate that she had to move her life to KY for as long as it takes but what a relief for me. I know it makes her feel better being here too. I would never have asked her to come but so thankful she made that decision.
So I made a decision last night that I am starting a 90 day challenge. I am going to track my food again, go to the Healthpark at least 4 days a week for at least an hour and track that as well. According to my physical therapy doctor I can only do the water aerobics and NuStep machine.
I have only been able to go 2 days a week for the past couple of months and only 1 day the entire month of June. Between that and the fact that I haven't been eating right, I'm actually encouraged that I only gained up to 161 but have lost to 154.8 as of today.
My goal is more to lose inches than weight during this time. Of course, I want to lose weight but want to LOOK like I've lost too. My weight goal is 140. So...November 30th is the day!!
Prayer would be appreciated. During this 90 days I'm fairly certain my mom will go home to her heavenly father and see her mother she keeps wanting to go see. This is going to be very difficult even though I know it's better for her. She won't be suffering any longer. I even pray that God doesn't keep her here much longer because she isn't herself at all. She doesn't know where she is or even who some of her family are at times. She wouldn't want to live like this. Regardless, it will be very, very hard. I pray that during that time I can still keep my focus on getting me healthier again.
I sure do hope this makes sense because had very little sleep for a couple of days but needed to post this so I can have prayer and encouragement from my spark friends. Love you all and appreciate all that you do!! I know I couldn't do it without you and my Lord!!