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Just another day!

Tuesday, October 09, 2012

I am just so off, anxious, sad and angry. The thing that frustrates me the most is that all of these emotions are hitting me like a brick wall.
All of these emotions pertain to my life in general but they hit me hardest when i think of my mother-in-law. I am sad for her but I can't cry, I am anxious just knowing everyday what she's going thru and angry that it happened to her.
I also share these emotions within myself about my life everyday. Today my mind is spinning so out of control i just want to blow my head off.
I am having anxiety going into the grocery store and other places. So much anxiety that i am scratching myself like places on my body really itch.
Today i am just trying to get by. Trying to keep busy but am having a hard time just getting up and getting motivated.
I don't see my therapist for a week because she is out of town. I really fall back when she's gone and i don't have my session. She told me i could email or text her. But I haven't heard from her. I get scared when I am like this.
I am taking soup to my mother-in-laws later so that should get me up to take a shower and go over there.
Sorry this blog is so depressing for those that need motivation but I just had to let go today. I hope everyone else has a great day. Bye for now.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    How lovely that you can add soup and comfort to your Mother In Law's days. It is hard to look outside yourself when you are struggling, but you have done it. And will continue to do it.

    Wishing the best of comfort for all of you and your family,
    2683 days ago
    emoticon my heart goes out to you in your pain. Dealing with a terminal cancer diagnosis is never an easy task. It hurts when the people that we love hurt. I am so very sorry for your dilemma. I get what I call "high anxiety" too and it is the most uncomfortable of sensations. Having such an uncertain future is terrible pain and trying to deal with the grief must be unbearable. You have captured my heart today. I shall keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. I hope that you can draw strength from those of us out here who only wish you well during this trying time. I can relate to some of your trials, since I am a breast cancer survivor. I have been where you are. Sending you some positive energy to go with those hugs. Take care and God bless, Deb emoticon
    2695 days ago
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    2695 days ago
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