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I need a new life

Sunday, November 04, 2012

I had fun yesterday at the mall. It was good to get away and wander for awhile. I got a new pair of tennis shoes and a new purse. I wasn't going to get the purse, but my current one is starting to fall apart and my husband insisted I get the purse. He said I haven't had anything nice in awhile so I should get it. I think he just wanted to make sure I'd let him get a new video game. At least he got one we can both play - Monopoly. We played that for awhile last night after we got home.

Today I am down. We're only weeks away from Thanksgiving. My parents are coming and it will just be the four of us. Normally that would be good news. This year I keep thinking about how to make it gluten free. At least I'm cooking so I have control. I don't want to cut out staples, like green bean casserole, but I can't eat it and my husband won't. If I could find a substitute for the onions I'd be okay. I have a GF mushroom soup. It's not condensed, but I wouldn't add the milk. Really that shouldn't be a big deal. When my parents are here we eat out a lot. Eating out is just so much hassle now. If they want to eat out Wednesday when they get here I'll suggest HuHot, since they are the most allergy-friendly restaurant I know of. I've eaten there a few times since being GF, and it's one of my favorite restaurants. Thursday is no problem since that's turkey day. Friday should be ok, leftovers. That leaves Saturday. A day of shopping and running around. First things first, I need to figure out the menu.

Normally we'd be going to my in-law's for the holiday, but this year they elected to go to Florida for a family vacation with my sister-in-law and her kids. I feel bad for my husband, this is the third holiday he hasn't been invited to with is parents. Last year Christmas was a fiasco and he ended up getting uninvited because he invited my parents. Then the fourth of July his parents went camping with his sister and her family. Christmas I'm sure I'll have to have my in-laws over, but I won't be included in their Christmas Eve celebration. Oh well, not much I can do about it. I'm the only child now and I can't very well tell my parents they aren't welcome. They come over three times a year and drive nine hours each way. My husband wants to include them in the celebrations, but they've always been at his parent's house. My parents aren't welcome there so my husband has to choose between spending the holidays with his wife or his parents. Christmas the last two years has been the two of us, his parents, and my parents at our place. As long as we eat when his parents request it's ok.

So the annual holiday drama is already getting to me. I bought a fall welcome wreath for the door to help cheer me up and now I can start looking for a winter one.

Work, or the people I work with, are turning me into someone I don't want to be. There aretwo girls that I work closely with that like to start drama. One is always complaining about her boyfriend, who if he is as bad as she makes him look, she is an idiot for staying with him. She says she stays because of their son and because she might be pregnant again. She doesn't want to be pregnant and said she might terminate. That's another thing. Abortion is a strong subject for me. I've known girls who have had abortions in the past, but have never had someone do it while I knew them. I don't know if I could be supportive.

The other girl I work with reminds me of I girl I knew in college. There is always something wrong. She always seems to be sick when things aren't going her way. The current one is saying she has Whooping Cough after she couldn't get the day she wanted off. Everything is very coincidental and makes it hard to believe what she says.

My husband starts his shortened hours tomorrow. We have no idea what his hours are so this will be interesting. Doesn't make a lot of sense to me to drive for an hour to work four hours and then drive an hour back. He thinks he'll have more hours right now due to the hurricane and hopes that in six months he can move to a different department and be full-time. I hope so. I need something to be settled.

I need to start looking for another job if he does get in full-time so we can move. That means I have to try again to get my transcripts. I tried before since I needed original copies to send for some thing related to work. I never received them and the time was up so I had to turn in the only copies I had. That was freaking me out the other night so I couldn't sleep. Last night I couldn't sleep because I was worried about this presidential election. I need to learn to relax before I drive myself crazy.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Your holidays sounds like mine, only it's my siblings that don't get along. I am the only one they all talk to, so I always have to have two of every celebrations and it breaks my heart that the two sisters can't get along.

    I have decided in the past few years that I am not going to stress, that if adults can't get along and refuse to try, then it's not my problem or my drama. But I do miss the big family get togethers, as I know it also is so difficult for him to not have his family around all together.

    SO MY wishes for making the absolute best of everything and remember it's your sanity and your life and others can either join in and play nice or not play at all (in my humble opinion).
    2915 days ago
  • BEEJAY49
    It's a real shame that inlaws can't get along, that's when we start calling them outlaws. Hehe..Okay, just wanted a little smile there :)

    You have a lot to deal with. I don't know if you are religious so I hope I'm not over stepping the line, but try to let go and let God. Things will work out if you just let them happen.

    2916 days ago
    Have you tried writing down your worries then walking away from them? That may help you sleep better. Sleep is when our brain is working on figuring out problems (which is why you 'sleep on it') but worrying is a waste of energy, not being productive.

    Holidays drive a lot of people crazy. You know other's rules (your parent's can't go to your husband's parent's house) but you need to set your own rules too. If they get to say what can and can't happen, so can you. If that means your husband will be spending time with his family for 2 hours then coming home to be with your family, then that's the way it is (with your husband's permission of course). Once the rules are set, no more need to worry - it is what it is. Enjoy what you have and forgive the flaws of others as much as you can.

    These girls at work don't deserve to use their problems against you. Studies have shown that negative people live shorter, less healthy lives and the negativity they pass to others also hurts those around them. There's nothing that says you must listen to and be drawn into their drama. If they complain to you, tell them you're sorry their lives are so bad but you need to get back to work and then walk away. It will do you a world of good. You can't change their lies to get out of working, but that's for the bosses to deal with. If the one does have whooping cough she shouldn't be around the kids until she passes a doctor's physical, as it can kill kids. It also gives you reason to avoid her - if she might be sick, especially with such a highly contageous and dangerous condition, then you'd rather not be anywhere near her and risk catching it.

    As for your husband's job and the election, ask yourself what you can do/change right now. You're in a holding pattern until something happens (he finds out about his job, the election is over) so tell yourself you won't worry until you have more information. Then, instead of worrying, you will review your options for action. It's easier said than done, but worrying about things you have no control over does you no good.
    2917 days ago
    So sorry that your parents don't get along with his. That is not right and one of these days they will regret it. I am glad that your parents don't hold it against him.. Just enjoy your time with him and your parents.
    2917 days ago
    You have a full plate in front of you. Don't get overwhelmed. Everything will work out ok. Take one step at a time. Here for you if you just need someone to vent to or a sympathtic ear. Holidays are hard. But together we can make it through them.
    2917 days ago
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