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Long time NO blog

Tuesday, November 06, 2012

Yes it has been a long time since I have blogged on here. I have lurked but that is about it. I am getting back into gear in making time for ME! GOSH this is SOOO hard when you are a mom of 3 and a girlfriend and practically a mom to his daughter too. I have never been good at being selfish. This is how I felt last night when I dropped my son off from his counseling appointment and ran to the gym. SELFISH! I am not prepared for this so my kids ate microwave food for dinner. Why is it when I am doing something for me something has to give and I feel bad in one area of my life. UGH It is frustrating and it is the thing that ultimately makes me quite. I don't want to quite though. I hate being bigger. I no longer want to squeeze into my clothes. Everyone around me has recently been losing weight too so this does not help. I am back up to 192. I swear my body loves this weight? WHY??? Why can't it love the 150's? Why does it feel comfortable and cozy with all this extra blubber on it? UGH. I did work hard last night in the gym. I did this machine that isn't a elliptical and isn't a treadmill I forget what it is called but I think it was the machine for death. UGH I did it for 15 minutes. It is suppose to be better than the treadmill for you? Really? I couldn't last and I didn't burn a lot of calories either. PLUS the lady said it was low impact and shouldn't effect my knees....are you kidding me?? My legs were so sore!! I did give it a chance and I am interested so I will try it again but I went to what I knew the treadmill for 35 min. I ran 3 miles then did the weights the trainer has me doing. I did this 6 week pass for $10 and I got 3 personal trainer sessions then unlimited tanning for the 6 weeks too! So far I have been 3 times since last Thursday. The weekends I spend up in Bellevue so I don't come down and work out just to much gas so I am trying to go to the gym at least 4 times a week. I just hope the selfish feeling goes away and I can work out with peace and know I am doing the right thing. BALANCE that is what I need. UGH how do I find Balance? I just feel over whelmed at times and something gives and that is me. BUT I am standing up and I am going to talk to the kids about balance and where they can help me because I am grouchy and not as nice when I am gaining weight and not eating healthy and working out. I am a better me and a better mom I think ONCE I get into a routine. SO PLAN of action get organized and prepared better~!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • NANCYPAT1
    You can do it. Savor the time when your kids are still KIDS because there is a whole lot of time when they are suddenly grown up and you don't even KNOW where all that time went. You want to make your memories NOW while you can. You will and can take care of yourself and be a good mom too.
    2797 days ago
  • MANDIETERRIER1
    My body seems to love 137 lbs. I wish it would love 125 lbs. Hang in there you will get there!

    emoticon
    2797 days ago
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