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"Showing you pity doesn't do you any favours"

Sunday, July 28, 2013

That is one of my favourite Jillian Michaels quotes - they also have it up on the wall in the biggest loser gym.

At first glance some may see it as harsh. But look a little closer... what is she really saying? Not to show pity when someone is upset? Not to show pity when someone needs a helping hand?

No

Where we make the mistake is showing pity and looking for pity when what we really need is a good old fashioned dose of hardcore reality. Someone telling us "its okay take the day off and relax instead of going to gym - you have been working so hard" doesn't help anyone!
Telling yourself "its ok eat that burger and milkshake and cake because you've had a bad day and deserve something to make you feel better" and having someone validate that for you by saying yes go ahead it is ok, is NOT doing you any favours.
Showing pity when the person is trying to quit, or find an excuse to stay sad and unhealthy or 'fail' by giving up is not doing anyone any favours.

Sometimes the best way you can help someone and be helped by someone is not the kind pat on the back and the 'its ok'. Sometimes its the harder route - saying no. you are not giving up. no you are not going to sabotage yourself. no I am not going to let you make yourself feel like a failure again.
Its saying get up and come train with me. Or throw that junk away and come eat a healthy meal with me.
That's really doing someone a favour
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • BROOKLYN_BORN
    I totally agree. It was easy for me to ignore my weight gain. People kept telling me that I was fine, that I could "carry it" Definitely, no favors there.
    2607 days ago
  • GETFITMOMMY12
    Amen!!!
    2608 days ago
  • no profile photo CD4516954
    Agreed!
    2608 days ago
  • ADVENTURESEEKER
    YES! I agree.
    2609 days ago
  • DAWNDMOORE40
    emoticon I totally agree with that philosophy! I used to feel sorry for myself. I would sit around and eat at night because I was lonely and I used food to sooth myself, but then after my Gall Bladder surgery and all the pain I went through, I woke up one day, and said this is the moment you are going to change your life! Then I found Spark People and I am forever blessed! It has really changed my life. I admit I just went through several weeks after I got to my goal weight of thinking I could slack off a little bit on my eating as long as I was still working out every day, and boy was I wrong! I gained weight on the scale. So now I am back on track again, and fortunately for me, I only gained 7 lbs before I realized I was sabotaging myself again! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    2609 days ago
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