underlying fear

I realize now I'm actually afraid to get thin. I am losing weight and im terrified. First of all, i may actually be successful and begin a new life. Change is not easy for me. I dont like new things sometimes even if they are positive. All those failed attempts were easy. Staying in the same rut, easy.
Maybe, ill actually have a productive and healthy life. Would that mean more guys would like me? Would i have a better social life? Would i succeed at all those things that i thought were out of reach and virtually impossible? The weight loss is scary. I will be a new person literally half of what i weigh is the weight of a person. Will losing half of me change me? Hopefully for the better.

Then i think i have to do this. Just a little at a time