So let's get right into it.
Within calorie range
I even got in some ST!
This was another day of having to drag myself through. It might be because I want to get some things done around the house and I am not getting them done. It might be because I have had 2 really late nights and tonight is another one. It could also be because my hubster is now really confused about whether he is released to go back to work or not. Okay so maybe it is all of those things.
I have to give myself a break. Yes I did take some time out for myself but I let some crucial things go by the wayside. I think after this blog I will try to get some of them done since I will be up late waiting for my daughter to come home.
I got to thinking about how when I am feeling positive about my weight loss, I can see a difference in other areas of my life. My house begins to look better because I am more likely to clean on a regular basis. When I am not on track with my weight loss, I seem to let everythiing go. This isn't just in regards to myself but my house as well.
It is interesting that there are other things affected by whether I am on track or not. I guess that is all the more reason for me to keep a positive attitude and keep pushing forward. I want to be healthy and I want my house to be a comfortable place for me and my family.
I hardly ever get company but I know that when I do, I get embarrassed when the house is messy. It is the same feeling I get about being over weight and being out around people. I get embarrassed that I look the way I do. I wonder what people are thinking/saying about me. I think that is exactly where the anxiety/panic disorder came from.
Now, I am working on not thinking about what everyone else might be thinking/saying about me. Every once in a while, I might go outside and start thinking that my neighbors are all looking out the window at the same time and they are talking about me. I have come to realize that just like I don't stand at my window all day looking at them, they aren't doing that to me! I am NOT that interesting!
I always seem to return to one important thing and that is keeping a positive attitude. It is so crucial. If I beat myself up and think/say negative things, I get off track, eat out of control, and eventually stop doing all the things I need to do to lose the weight.
When I am positive about myself and my journey, I am more likely to stretch to the next level. I stay on track. I encourage and motivate myself. I can see myself reaching my goals. I can talk myself down from that bag of Doritos and let me tell you that isn't an easy task!
Today I started to give up on myself (yes you read that right) I had to turn those thoughts around and refocus myself and think positive thoughts. I am not sure just what triggered the negative thoughts but I was on the "I don't want to do this, who cares" detour and I had to find the exit ramp quick fast and in a hurry!!!
I care and I DO want to do this. It isn't easy and I might not do everything perfectly but I can do it, I must do it, and I will do it!! It isn't about being perfect or copying someone else. It isn't about trying to meet everyone else's expectations. It is about getting healthy. It is about persistence. It is about making this a lifestyle and not a diet. It is about making this lifestyle fit me and what I need to get me to that healthy place. It is about getting off the medicines (again). It is about getting to where I can keep up with Marlie. I have a LONG list of what this is all about and what I will gain or be able to do as I lose this weight. Hmmm maybe I should look over that list when those negative thoughts try to push their way around!
Alright ladies and gentlemen, I have got to go. Be sure to check out the next episode! Boy my fingers are tired. I need to figure out this camera so I can do this in a vlog!