An obligatory post about New Years (or my soapbox rant about the Magic of Mondays and individual res
Thursday, January 01, 2015
Alright. It's January first. Usually one of my favorite days of the year. Why? Because it's that magical day where all your plans and schemes can finally take off. Second to the first of the year is every Monday, where all your goals can start over. You know what I mean, right?
"I'll start working out on Monday, that way I can rest on the weekends and start my week off right. Ooops, it's Wednesday and I forgot the past two days. Guess I have to start over on.... Monday."
January first is just the next level higher of my Monday insanity. I do this to myself all the time. Gotta print off all my month to month planners and checklists and organizers on January first so I can be prepared for the rest of the year. Gotta start eating right. Gotta start exercising. Gotta wait for Monday.
What is up with the magic of Mondays? Or New Years? I mean sure, it is a big deal. We are leaving one year behind and entering the next. The whole world is celebrating, which I'll admit is pretty cool. But is it really as big of a deal as we make it out to be? I mean stop a second and think it through. Per the calendar year, is there really anything THAT fantastic about January 1? Each day, week, month, and year goes on just like the last, and God willing, so will all the rest yet to come.
I used to really like New Years. It was so fun and exciting to stay up late and watch all the parties taking place. It was a big deal to me. It was a huge deal. Then I got older, midnight lost its magic "It's only 12? Sheesh, it's still early" and I just stopped caring. Resolutions always failed, and made me feel like a failure, and the past few years I haven't even celebrated. I tried a few times, but everyone else beat me to the punch making their own plans first. So I made my excuses and stayed in. Heck, I didn't even stay up late last night. I was in bed with a headache by ten. Happy freaking New Years to me.
But this year, I really don't care. I'm sure you're reading this with a skeptical "suuuure Katie, that's exactly why you're here, posting about New Years. Because you don't care. Ok we believe you..." Of course, I've been thinking through what I want to achieve this year. I do that every day, so it's not exactly a break from the norm for me. And yes, I did come up with a focus word for 2015.
I'm just not banking on today being the best day ever. Or that 2015 somehow owes it to me to be good just because 2014 was not. You know why 2014 wasn't a good year for me? Because I allowed it to be. I focused WAY too much on the negatives, and grant you there were a lot of them. But again, I allowed, or in some cases, caused most of them to occur. If there is one thing I've learned the past couple of years, it's that no one is on your side.
That sounds depressing and harsh, but it's not. What I mean to say is this: 90% of the world doesn't know, or care, that I exist. Of the remaining 10%, about 5% knows I exist and couldn't care less about what happens to me either. Maybe it's a co-worker who has had it out for me since day one. Or a casual acquaintance that is clearly playing the comparison game. The people that I would just like to avoid in any given circumstance. Then there's about 4% of people who would be on my team- friends, extended family. My cheerleaders. Maybe they even made signs.
But those people are not die hard groupies, the people who will be out there no matter the weather or circumstances or what the score is. That 1% are people like my parents, or a couple of close friends- and I mean CLOSE. They are people I can call at 2 in the morning to talk with, or rant for an hour on the phone, or just talk about nothing at all. I know they'd have my back and I have theirs.
However, I have made the mistake in thinking that even the one percent, who really do care deeply, could carry me when things got rough. Those who are in my corner can't fight for me. At the end of the day, the person who makes my life what it is, is me.
So, lesson learned. I hope. I've always said I was a big believer in individual responsibility. It's time to show that in how I live my life. No more excuses, no more whining, no more depending on anyone else to get it done. Life is basically like a big group project- the only person you can count on to make things happen is yourself.