Having a fat day. It is a good day for me to tell myself to "shut it"!
Thursday, February 05, 2015
For 730 days I treated myself poorly. I ate what I wanted hid from scales and mirrors. I was the master of dodging from pictures. I let myself go because I was so miserable with my life. I had no self esteem or strength to put toward me because I was being the person holding my family together.
45 days ago I took back my life. I told my family that I deserve to be happy. That they need to take care of their problems themselves and I will be here to support them but I am miserable doing it all. Time for them to step up.
What has happened in 45 days? They are stepping up. No life is not perfect but it is improving. My husband is doing his own thing. My girls are being more responsible. I am pleased that they listened to my plea. I have put myself first. I am eating low carb and feeling good about myself for the first time in a long time. I have lost 18 lbs that I intend on never finding again.
Today is a bad day. I feel fat. I have eaten good all week. I have exercised a couple of times. I just feel....meh. So I have to say this.... Shut it! Shut the self doubt talk off. Shut the put downs that you are thinking off. Shut the self sabotaging behaviors off! I am doing this. I am caring for myself. I am being kind to myself. So maybe this week will be a maintenance week and I will not feel great. But I am going to shut this foul mood before it undoes all of the hard work that i have put in for the past 45 days.
I can do this and I am going to check my negativity at the door. Time for some sunshine!