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ANGIEN9
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Feeling defeated.

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

I have been thinking today about my initial weight loss and the regain of 30 some pounds. I know part of the regain is medication. The part that just makes me want to scream at myself is the over-eating thus creating pain in my knees and spine from the weight. emoticon I have fallen back into a pattern of unhealthy eating and little to no exercise. emoticon I did so well for 3 years. I took of 80 pounds and was under 200 pounds. emoticon My knees didn't hurt. I wasn't eating for comfort. emoticon I could walk and not get winded. emoticon My self esteem and confidence was up. What happened? What rocked my world? Why did I stop taking my medication? I have yet to figure that out. So much I don't remember in 2013.

I know one thing. I feel vulnerable. Not sure I will ever feel anything other than that. I know I am rambling. I just wanted to get it out. See if that would help. Something has got to make me feel like I deserve to be healthy. I can't keep beating myself up for what is in the past. This PTSD is just killing my psyche. The EMDR has got to work. I am tired of the flashbacks. The feelings that come with them. I am not that little girl anymore. I am an adult the past needs to be dealt with and left there. I am not sure that will ever happen. I can hope.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • FRAN0426
    Angie, there are others that deal every day with weight problems do to meds we are on. I am one of them, weight loss is not easy with all the meds I am on. However, I will not go off medication I need to lose weight. Take this one day at a time, do what you can to help by eating right and exercising when and how much you can handle.
    2204 days ago
  • OBIESMOM2
    emoticon
    do your best to focus on the things that you CAN do. I know that it's difficult, but I KNOW that you can do what you put your mind to do.
    2205 days ago
  • BOPPY_
    I'm looking forward to reading your plan, right, her!

    Lee emoticon
    2205 days ago
  • JEANINNEWCASTLE
    One thing at a time to get back on track. Start with the meds. emoticon
    2205 days ago
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