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starting over

Thursday, April 09, 2015

Back in 2010 (I believe) I was super active on this site. I had gone from like 403 to 209 pounds and was absolutely happy with my progress. But then life happened. I left my husband and got into a difficult relationship with an alcoholic and then I left him and got married to someone else...then got pregnant. I am not trying to make excuses for my current weight (351) but the reason I gained was worth it. It all started after I left the alcoholic. I was very depressed. I thought I could save him but as it turns out, I couldnt. He didn't want to be helped and that made me depressed and eat. I went from 209 to 245. I met my current husband at 245 and after a few months of recovering from depression I got into his bad eating habbits. He ate out for every meal...and I kept telling myself just one more time...but I couldn't stop. Then I weighed myself and I was 281! I got so depressed again but I snapped out of it and started walking and exercising again and got down to 265. I was happy but then I started having issues with our relationship and I gained weight again. I was really angry at myself when I stepped on the scale and it said 290 pounds. I spent a few weeks trying to be healthy and failing. I felt angry all the time and my mom kept telling me to take a pregnancy test. I couldn't figure out why since I was told in my early 20s that I couldn't have kids. She kept telling me I was acting like she did when she was pregnant so I finally took a test to shut her up. I was stunned when it said positive. I didn't believe it until I went to the doctor. It was true, I was indeed pregnant. I was 5 weeks when I found out and at 6 weeks I was bleeding. I was put on bed rest for most of my pregnancy. I kept gaining weight and there was nothing I could do about it. That made me depressed and I eat when I'm depressed....so by the time I had my son at 36 weeks I weighed 352 pounds. My recovery was brutal. My incision kept opening, and I had to have a wound vac and it was painful. Even after my incision healed my insides hurt so bad and I was exhausted from taking care of my son that I didn't exercise. I lost a few pounds but after a while I gained it back. It's been 5 months since my son was born and I feel ready to get a hold of myself and get back on track. Wish me luck!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Hi Coreybeth, oh sweetie, you have been through a lot... emoticon emoticon emoticon but you CAN do this... one day at a time, one step at a time. I'm going to pray for you as well... peace, strength, healing, and wholeness in every area of your life, and blessings upon you and your baby. emoticon emoticon Karen

    1869 days ago

    you have really been through it

    my prayer for you is for peace, healing and strength in your journey

    i am going to add you as a sparkfriend because i think there are big things ahead for you and i want to be there to cheer you on.

    you've done it before, you know what it takes, and now you are taking the steps !!

    1874 days ago
  • no profile photo CD1479887
    emoticon emoticon You have really been through a lot but you are now ready to begin a lifestyle change. emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1874 days ago
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