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Strange concerns

Tuesday, April 28, 2015

I'm not sure this counts as a NSV, but in the last several weeks, I've had a few people who hadn't seen me in a while ask if I had lost weight, and if I were seriously ill. So, on the one hand I guess it's gratifying that the weight loss is apparent, but on the other hand I'm not really aiming to look as if I'm wasting away due to cancer or some other life-threatening disease.

It's a bit strange to deal with these comments because I'm ordinarily a private person and and not the sort to bluntly ask someone else what is going on with her weight and health. Should I try to come up with some witty retort for the next time someone asks me if I am desperately ill? I think they mean well so I don't want to make anyone feel uncomfortable, but I'm getting a little tired of explaining myself.
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  • LILLYROSEGRAM
    I am exactly the way you are, and this is a tough situation. I'm not sure what I would do when the questions come from someone I don't know very well. PJDaniels suggestions sound like a good way to go in this instance. But, when the questions come from someone close to me, I probably would make a joke about being insulted that they think I look so bad I must be ill. Then, I would reassure them I am well and thank them for noticing my weight loss.

    Let us know how things go with the response you choose when it happens again.

    emoticon emoticon
    2183 days ago
  • BUTTONPOPPER1
    I read this before leaving for work yesterday and wracked my brain on the train trying to think of a witty response. But you're too nice to reply with the only not-so-witty-and very-trite comeback I came up with if people ask if you're sick, which is this: "Yes, I'm sick. Sick of people asking me if I'm sick." See, you're too polite for that, right? And actually, I couldn't say such a thing either, even if I sometimes fantasize about being snappy and sarcastic. Gotta keep the world running smoothly, right, and not stoop to others' level if their intentions are not noble. Most people, though, have good intentions , I think,

    In conclusion, I agree with Pam. She has given advice worthy of an advice columnist! Smile sweetly, murmur something vague, and move on!
    2184 days ago
  • PJDANIELS
    I had that happen, ask if I was losing weight on purpose or if I was ill. Response was I'm fine, but thanks for asking. No need for explanation. Someone says have you lost weight? or how much? Oh, I'm working on it, I've lost a few pounds. No explanation needed. Some will acknowledge your weight loss meaning well and some are just nosy but if you feel it is intrusive remember you don't owe them an answer just because they asked the question. And yes, I take that as a victory, your weight loss is showing. --Pam
    2184 days ago
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