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The privileges of motherhood

Friday, June 19, 2015

I spent half the day in the hospital with our kid today. She had minor surgery - a ~foot-long titanium rod threaded through the center of her ulna had to be removed. About a year ago, we also spent half a day in the hospital, when she had the rod inserted, to align the broken bones in her forearm as they healed.

A year ago, the general anaesthesia made our kid quite nauseous, and she was sick for about a day after surgery. We braced ourselves for the same today, but instead she was ravenous. What a difference a year, and better preparation, make!

As we waited for the anaesthesiologist, the kid lying on the cot and me trying not to rock myself dizzy in the chair next to her, I thought about how fortunate I am to be a mother and that our kid wants me with her during difficult times. And as I sat in the waiting room checking for updates on the pager during surgery, and shook the doctor's hand when he came out to tell me everything had gone well, I thought about how fortunate I am that we have access to great health care so that our kids are treated so compassionately and expertly when in need. And as I sat next to our kid as she slowly came out of her grogginess, I marveled at how fortunate I am to enjoy a sweet, silly, lovely, loving, and smart daughter.

I guess all the sitting around waiting while everyone else did all the work gave me lots of time to think. I'm sometimes not the best equipped at being the mother of a teenage girl. I don't use makeup and have no idea how to apply it properly, so the kid has to figure that out herself - the most she does is apply mascara sometimes which I think is enough since I think healthy teenagers are beautiful without any enhancement. I wear boring "Mom clothes" so can't give her any fashion advice, but she seems to have figured out a style for herself somehow. And the plucking and tweezing - yeah, I don't know how to do that properly either.

So when the kid brought up waxing, which I have never done in my life, I had to go to amazon to read reviews to figure out what to get. And when the little pots of wax arrived two days ago, we were both excited and afraid of what we had gotten ourselves into. At one point, the two of us had applied melted wax to our faces in front of the bathroom mirror, and as we peeled the strips from the delicate skin above our top lips and shriek-laughed in mutual excruciating pain, I could not help thinking: yes, this is a new phase of this mother-daughter thing.

Oh, and the doctor gave us the titanium rod as a souvenir. I'm thinking of framing it along with X-rays of before and after the rod was inserted. Is that weird? I'm not sure where I'll hang it....

eta: OMG. We're sitting here watching Les Mis (one of her favorites) *again* and she keeps telling me that the English guy with the bad teeth and high singing voice is "so hot." Not ready for this. Gaaa.

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  • PJDANIELS
    So glad everything went well. I absolutely would somehow keep the rod, display it in a shadow box, something. How funny, your waxing experience. She will remember that all of her life, you two doing it together and shrieking. --Pam
    2131 days ago
  • BUTTONPOPPER1
    I'm so glad to hear that your daughter's surgery went well. It is indeed touching that she wanted you right there beside her at what would for anybody be a sort of scary time. General anesthesia. Just the idea makes me scared. Can't stand to lose control. But she felt safe just having you nearby, although I can certainly understand your trying not to rock yourself dizzy. It's hard to hide anxiety and downright fear! I'm not good at it. I scream during earthquakes. A bad example.

    Anyway, it sounds as if you have a great relationship with your daughter. I remember your delight at your forearm skins flapping in the dryer in the public toilet, your sharing of Flamin' Hot Cheetos, and now lip-waxing and shrieking together. Such lovely memories!

    But I understand the shrieking very well. Lip waxing? So, so painful. You can take it off by yourselves?! You two are TOUGH!!

    Enjoy this new phase with your sweet teen (an oxymoron, but in your case it seems to be true!)!
    2132 days ago

    Comment edited on: 6/19/2015 4:43:39 AM
  • no profile photo ELRIDDICK
    Thanks for sharing
    2132 days ago
  • ZRIE014
    have a nice day
    2132 days ago
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