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But I...

Monday, October 12, 2015

Today was a really tough day. No that isn't right, this month has been extremely tough. Delays in the adoption process of our daughter, trying to gather unobtainable, required documents resulting in sleepless nights wracked with panic attacks and realizing that we are once again going to be separated as a family for the holidays has brought such sadness, frustration and feelings of hopelessness. Today, really?

Today, I really didn't want to get out of bed, but I did. I found great joy in the laughter of my daughters as they told me their dreams of the night at the breakfast table.

Today, I really did not want to track my food, but I did, every single bite! I ended the day at the low end of my range.

Today, I really did not want to exercise, but I did. I actually rode the bike for 50 minutes, walked/ran my fastest pace yet for 60 minutes, and strength trained for another 60 minutes. My Fitbit even said I burned 3,018 calories.

Today, I really did not want to think about next week, but I did. I shopped for all meals for next week and even managed to find my favorite Greek yogurt for a special treat!

Today, I really wanted to give in and eat that container of rocky road ice cream that I knew was hidden deep in my freezer, but I didn't. I ended the evening with a cup of hot tea and a conversation with God. He gave me strength, hope and courage for tomorrow.

Today, I wanted to quit...but I didn't!

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • PCOH051610
    This is a great post! And, I especially loved the drawing your daughter did!
    1843 days ago
    Great job Lisa!! emoticon I know it must be so hard to think of being separated for the holidays but trust in God (as I know you do). Things have a way of working themselves out for the best! My prayers will be with you and your family!
    emoticon emoticon
    1843 days ago
    Good for you. You have so much going on right now, and you did not give in. You should be proud of yourself, and feeling good that you are taking care of yourself instead of using it as an excuse to slide back into old habits. Hope all calms down for you and your family.
    1844 days ago
  • no profile photo CD14269091
    I am so proud of you! HUGS!!!
    1844 days ago
    Lisa --- a wonderful example.

    I'm not going through as much as you but --- I have not shown the same examples

    Thanks for the blog!

    1844 days ago
    Amen! It's hardest when "you don't want to" but you still did.
    1844 days ago
    Hang in there and take care of yourself. That little girl needs a healthy mommy
    1844 days ago
    God can handle this with you. He has his reasons for everything we just may not agree with how he does things. Turn it over to him and he will see uou through
    1845 days ago
    I agree. This is a brutally honest post. You did remarkably well with the situation. Keep God close to give you strength and you will be rewarded in time. Keep up the exercise and the Healthy eating any you will reward yourself everyday.
    1845 days ago
  • GODSCHILD2_2011
    I love this blog because you're open and honesty. emoticon job on not giving into temptation.

    In my opinion, God is the BEST person to talk to and lean on for everything . I pray that all things get going for the completion of your adoption of your daughter.

    I hope things turn around for so very quickly.

    1845 days ago
  • no profile photo S127041
    I admire your strength! This is a powerful post.
    1845 days ago
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