A Spark Pep Talk
Wednesday, May 25, 2016
A Sparkfriend is struggling, and wrote me a Sparkmail asking for advice. Here is what I told her -- I hope it helps!!:
First of all, I was REALLY overweight last year. I have lost over a hundred pounds in a year. How did I do it, how am I continuing, and how have I made it work....
First, buy the Beck Book.
The Beck Diet Solution: Train Your Brain to Think Like a Thin Person
By Judith Beck
This book, chapter by chapter, gives you the tools to stop using food as a comfort, stop using food to satisfy urges and desires, to believe in yourself. It really does help. I believe in Beck's book.
I didn't read this book until I had lost about 60 pounds. I started losing weight by logging in every day, tracking every single thing I ate (and I STILL track every single thing I eat), and finding some exercise that was doable. I had a fractured knee last year, and started from a wheelchair, and just started by getting up. Then I went to chair yoga, riding a bike, and later, when I got more confidence, I started to swim. Swimming was something that I NEVER would have believed I could do last year, getting on a suit, not giving a damn and getting in the pool. I do it all the time now.
I would also say that you have to KNOW you are worth this. Know that there is no food that tastes better than having a great sense of self feels. That there is no food that could possibly beat waking up every day with a smile. It took me a while, my whole life, actually, but now, I feel pretty damned good.
So, Beck, tracking, exercise. And forgive yourself. NOTHING you did yesterday, today or a year ago matters anymore. Forgive everything. Erase that from your mind and start tomorrow, knowing you are worth every single second of this effort.
I don't know if this is what you want to hear, but this is what I have. This is how I feel after losing 125 pounds, and how I feel right now, sitting here typing to you.
I do a bunch of things differently. I do not have anything in my house that could possibly intrigue me. If I say no in the store, I don't have to say no at home. I don't EVER eat fast food. I eat as clean as possible. I make a lot of substitutions. For example, my Daughter lives with me...she's 24. She brought fish tacos home yesterday, and I wanted one (I added up an estimate of the calories of the fried fish, the double tortillas, the cheese, the sauce in my head and realized I couldn't do it). I didn't have one, but bought some corn tortillas, some cabbage and some low fat cheese, baked some fish (no butter), and made fish tacos that were about 120 calories each. I do that all the time.
I make my food. I make bran muffins filled with good stuff, and have one and an orange every breakfast. I have been making yogurt parfaits for lunch...organic vanilla yogurt, raspberries, nectarines, blackberries and a small amount of granola without sugar. I LOVE those parfaits. I also have homemade burritos in the freezer, and have those available anytime. I want to know what I am eating these days.
Make good things to eat, that you can plan on eating. That is and was important to me too.
Last thing, you cannot think of this as a diet. You have to think of it as a change of lifestyle, for, if you don't fix the part of you that wants to eat, you will never keep the weight off. Trust me, I didn't think I could do this, but now I know I not only did, but will continue on this path forever.
Let me know if you need any more help. YOU CAN DO THIS!!