Day 189 of my VLCD Journey!
Thursday, July 07, 2016
Name calling, I am pretty sure everyone on this sight has experienced name calling either in school or have heard the whispers behind your back. As someone who has been overweight most of my life it was something I have always dealt with. The names can hurt so bad, and can cause more damage because I would turn to food as a comfort because I was already fat and ugly so why does it matter if i get fatter. How can we allow other people make us feel so bad about ourselves, why did I allow this to happen. I am better then this. I deserve better then this.
These are the daily struggles I bounce in my head. I get so mad at myself for allowing others to impact my life so much. Learning to not listen to the negativity is hard to do when you have told yourself, and others have said it for so long.
I have gotten approval from the insurance agency to see a therapist who specializes in eating disorders and now I am waiting for contact to set up an appointment. I feel this will be the next step in my weight loss journey so i can better my self esteem so I don't sabotage myself. I am so worth being healthy.
My niece who is 20 started working out yesterday and I told her how proud I was of her. She called me an inspiration to her. I couldn't believe she that. It actually made me cry. I mentally abuse myself on my down falls I haven't been paying attention to my weight loss affect on others. I am hoping that I can continue to inspire others as others have inspired me. I hope seeing a counselor will help me see the positives. I am not ashamed to say I need help. I needed help to lose weight and this is part of it.
So to all who comment and are sending me support I want you to know that I am so thankful for your support and cheering. I want you to all know that I am also cheering you all on. We are going to get to our goals one day at a time and one step at a time!!