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Loss can really take a toll on you.......

Friday, October 28, 2016

I have been struggling since spring of 2016 with guilt for spending so much time on SP and on me. Then this past summer there were 2 deaths in our family, my uncle-inlaw in July and my sister in August. Now I am preparing my family to head to Iowa, I live in St Louis, to see my mother-inlaw, for what will probably be the last time. She has cancer that has spread to her brain.
On top of this, I haven't felt well for the last 2 weeks, and am awaiting a call from my doctor for test results........

I am tired!!!! My wait is the highest it has ever been, and I just don't care. Every time I get started something else happens. I am to the point where I am scared to even try. I am sick of failing.

I KNOW how to do this---I. Just. Can't.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • LINDAF49
    I paused to pray for you - for strength to do what you have to do and for the realization that you are important to and you have to care for you in order to care for others. I too seesaw back and forth about "too much time on Sparks - and have struggled with that "I don't care" feeling --- I cut way back on # of teams and Friends - trying to prioritize what is most important and what do I WANT to do and who is helpful or who do I want to be in touch with. Slow down - make a plan and then work the plan....
    Praying you can take a deep breath and choose a good path for you, smile and find a moment of success and build on it!! Gentle hugs and continue to BELIEVE in you!
    1462 days ago
  • SUNNYDAYTLH
    Take care of yourself first. You can not be there for others if you are not first there for yourself. We are here with you. Breath.
    1464 days ago
  • RIARENE
    No matter if you succeed of fail. What was the saying about the light bulb? He failed 100 times, but got it right the 101st? I know that sounds silly, but I believe it. And I believe in you. It's obvious that you care so much for people around you.
    1464 days ago
  • RIARENE
    I'm sorry your life is so stressful this year. I hope your test results come back okay. I lost someone this year too, so I know exactly where you are. There are no magic words to make it all better, so just know that there are people who support you
    1464 days ago
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