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That Was A Compliment, But

Friday, February 16, 2018

I recently ran into a colleague that I had worked with for about a year before I transferred to another clinic. He is a great guy, but doesn't have a filter so he just says what comes into his mind. I hadn't seen him in almost a year when we ran into each other at our main clinic. Our conversation went like this:

Bruce: "Look at you! Congratulations you look so great!"
Me: "Huh?"
Bruce: "You used to be so big, but look at you!"

The thing is, I have gained and lost the same 10 pounds for the last few years. I may be 10 pounds lighter than the last time I saw him, but there isn't a visible difference. I realized that in his mind I was huge. It made me sad to think that this is the way I am remembered. I am the fat girl. It brought back all of the insecurities and self-loathing that I have felt for years.

This conversation took me to a place that I have tried so hard to escape. A dark place full of self-hatred and depression. I am pulling myself out of it and focusing on my own goals. I want to be health, active and full of energy. Right now the weight is melting off and I am down a little over two pounds this week. I am finally making progress again and feeling good about myself, but this conversation haunts me. Sometimes a compliment is not so great.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • GO_GAL_GROW
    This journey has many steps. Mental strength, positive thinking is a key component and your next step. Cast away his comment, it no longer has any power over you. Move through this today by exercising your butt off, eating right, H2O, tracking, sleep
    1064 days ago
  • LABYRINTH
    Comments like these can be hard to deal with. Thoughtless and yes cruel whether he meant it that way or not. You are more then your size. Try to breathe this week and know that is only his opinion, and his reality, not yours.
    1073 days ago
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