Yesterday was a hard day. Full of stress and parental anxiety. We are working through something challenging in our family. We have one 19 year old son and he is facing some obstacles, changes, and challenges about his future. it's so hard when your kid is struggling and there isn't anything you can do to ease the way. I know in my heart, he will work through it. I know he will adjust, adapt, work harder, etc. But I miss those days when he was little and we could as parents just do something that makes it all better.
I also get that he has to have the adversity and struggle - it's life. It's real. It's not always instant gratification and easy. Knowing its a part of growth, character, etc doesn't make it any easier as a parent.
So I had every opportunity yesterday (because the day started off at 7:30am with challenges and continued all day....) to just default to my old habits. Drive through coffee and breakfast, pick up something greasy and fried for lunch, or to grab the chips and soda to snack. I could have just done takeout with a co-worker at my favorite place instead of eating my carefully planned, weighed and packed (although not tasty - won't do that again) lunch. It would have been very easy to nurse my nerves through food as I have done in the past. But I didn't.
I had my shake for breakfast - albeit at 11am because even though I made it at 9:30 it took me that long to get back to it. I skipped a snack between lunch and breakfast though - wasn't hungry. I ate my packed lunch, and managed to actually think to grab the grapes for a snack instead of rummaging at work for something else. Dinner was easier because I had planned for something we really like (meatball sandwiches). We may have overindulged in the cheese and had one more meatball than we were supposed to but we had nothing else with it - the sandwich itself was the meal. In the past I would have made French fries, or tater tots or brought out chips to go with it. So, to that end, the sandwich even with more than a serving of the cheese and meatball was a success.
I had one moment of weakness - I grabbled a bag of See's Candy that was giving to me at a gift exchange and ate a chocolate. My husband wanted me to do something and I told him to wait I was stress eating... and then it hit me - I WAS stress eating. So I enjoyed that chocolate, logged it as best I could into SP and then tossed the rest of the bag.
But overall, I did really well. I tracked, I was within range, I even completed my daily check sheet at the dinner table. The stress is still here, I can feel it. I'm learning to recognize some of the signs my body gives me. I can't change it yet but I'm going to learn how to work through it and not give in to my bad habits.