Wednesday, November 13, 2019
My doctor gave me no choice, I've been put on birth control, chose the depo shot. The medication he is next giving me was used in the past for abortions apparently so it's for a good reason..
Unfortunately my mother feels I am letting my husband down. He is also sick, and we've had close calls of losing him. My mother said if I do this, he will resent me in the future, basically I am selfish and don't want a baby. Anyone who's read my blogs knows I have tried and want one... life just hasn't given us the health to do so.
My husband said to take the medication, he wants me to get better. Just like he wants for himself. I just don't think mothers realize things said like this echo in the mind and soul. I went on the meds but now feel so guilty.
The prednisone I am on is such a low dose but man it gets to your water weight and hunger levels. This has all been a heavy journey. I'm struggling to start working out again, doing weight training once a week so far.
I wish things were different. Life would give my husband his life back and give me my health to do I can keep up with taking care of him.