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Happy New Year!

Thursday, January 14, 2021

I fought 2020, and 2021.


The new year's gotten off to a bit of a rocky start here, and I suspect that may be true for a whole lot of us. Maybe we should adjust expectations. If 2020 taught me anything, it's that maybe we set ourselves up for disappointment, living too much in the future or the past, and that disappointment can keep us in a bit of a "holding pattern" where we don't see what wonderful things lie right in front of us.

I'm about a week off track, but given the curve balls tossed out in the first week of January - both personal and in terms of current events - I'm going to let that go. We had a lovely - if quieter - Christmas (and saw distant relatives on Zoom, at least!) Our traditional New Year's Eve - just my husband and I - was lovely. A sad happenstance - the death of my MIL - brought much of the family together for a mini-reunion, and many hands lightened the burdens and brought smiles where there were tears, I hope.

For the first time in years, I spent nearly a week with my SIL and did NOT gain the usual six pounds! That's a little thing to celebrate.

My daughter has set an example of strength of character, resilience of mind and body, and a sense of humor that I am trying to emulate. I am learning to trust that my son is a grown man who doesn't always need my guidance, but it warms my heart that he still looks to me for it on occasion - more as a consultant than as a parent. The goal of any good parent or teacher is that the child or student surpass them, and become the teacher. Mine are both on track to do just that. I call that a success.

Just logging in here and doing the damned thing - that's also a success. I just need to figure out, now, why I managed dogged consistency at it in 2006 and 2017, reached my goals, and then let it all go? What subtle mind-shift do I need to make, to keep going past 2017 (I know, then, that my motivation was my daughter's wedding, a gorgeous dress, and a deadline) to 2006 (where I was also quitting smoking and struggling with depression - which you would THINK made reaching weight loss goals harder). If the difference, now, is that I am too happy and not under enough stress, I accept being fat. If that's the trade-off, I'm not thrilled but I'll take it.


I don't think that's it, though, do you?

Naah, I need to figure this out. Meanwhile, this is day two of the 7,342nd two-day streak on SparkPeople. Hello, World.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    We have certainly had our share of curve balls recently.

    Good luck moving forward. That's the only direction that makes sense.
    91 days ago
    . I agree the New Year and last has been very rocky. But there are wonderful times to look forward too. So sorry about the loss of your Mil.
    Yes, sounds like your did a great job with your kids.
    91 days ago
    Lovely post. Sorry for your loss. Congrats on not gaining weight during that time with SIL. That is a victory. Sounds like you raised good kids.
    91 days ago
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