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Not Now Lydia! Can’t You See I’m Driving!

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Thursday, March 04, 2021

Father driving with Lydia, his adoring four-year-old, who is buckled safely in the back seat. Lydia looks up to her daddy and listens to his every word. He is her hero and knows everything!

“Daddy what’s an M-buh-sill?”
“It’s somebody who’s twice as dumb as a moron!”
“What’s a moron?”
“It’s someone who is dumber than a post!”
“But posts aren’t dumb daddy! They don’t even have a brain.”
“Stop asking so many questions Lydia! Can’t you see I’m driving?”

“But daddy…You said when I have questions, I am posed to ask.”
“I didn’t mean it literally Lydia! It’s just a figure of speech!”

“A whaaaat?”
“Not now Lydia!”…“Well then when daddy?”
“When we get home, you can ask your mother!”
“But she’s not home. She went to Grandma’s. She won’t be back till next week.”

Silence for Two Minutes:

“Daddy where do babies come from?”

“That’s something you need to ask your mother Lydia!”
“But she said to ask you! Don’t you know?”
“Of course, I know Lydia! How do you think you got here? You need to google it!
“But Daddy I’m only four. I don’t know how to doodle.”

“I said google Lydia. Google. Not doodle. Pay attention! Googling and doodling are two different things!”
“It will explain more than you need to know!”
“But why can’t YOU tell me daddy?”
“Stop asking so many questions Lydia! Do I need to pull this car over?”

“I think I know why you won’t tell me.”
“Why is that?”
“Because you don’t weally know.” (said giggling)

Thanks for stopping by! A spark friend asked if I could use humor as the last blog was a bit heavy--although, I read every single post and appreciated everyone sharing and opening up. This truly is a rich community of mutual support. Now then, you know how Lydia came to be! (a short adaptation of a book I am currently writing)
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