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BEARTHOVEN
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BEARTHOVEN's Blogs

Day 3
Friday, February 10, 2012      1 comments

But I don't feel like it is what today's passage was about. I am supposed to name things I don't feel like doing on my d&e program today. I haven't felt like exercising for a long time now. I talk myself out of it everyday. So...... on M... Read more
Day 2 No Matter What
Thursday, February 09, 2012      0 comments

Today's topic is about being committed versus being interested. If only interested, you tend to be swayed easily if something better comes up, like a tasty treat,caloric night out with the girls, etc. Commited means staying on track no matte... Read more
Day 1
Wednesday, February 08, 2012      0 comments

I am reading "100 Days of Weight Loss". You are supposed to journal each day. Today's topic is "I Used To Be That Way". In other words...what are the things I used to do that I can change this time? Here's a list of any fears or negative beh... Read more
the night before
Sunday, March 20, 2011      2 comments

Okay, so I saw a video of myself tonight. Not so happy.... but this is why we are where we are..... Tomorrow morning i get on the scale. I have my food plan ready. I am ready to exercise. I am ready to stop eating emotionally by continuing... Read more
March 19
Saturday, March 19, 2011      0 comments

I want to say something positive today.... so.... today was a gloriously beautiful day! Hooray! I look forward to feeling more in control of my life, my eating and my emotions. I am ready. Yes, yes I am!!!!... Read more
relationships
Friday, March 18, 2011      0 comments

Sometimes I think it's easier to just stay at a distance from people. We all suck. Dealing with my own idiosyncracies is hard enough..... I think I like my cats better than people.... Read more
Blarney Stone
Thursday, March 17, 2011      1 comments

So a lot of my dieting issues have to deal with BLARNEY. Oh, I'll eat this now, and compensate later.... oh, a little bite won't hurt..... there's always tomorrow.... food just makes me feel good...... On Monday March 21st I will be starting ... Read more
why does everything need a title?
Wednesday, March 16, 2011      0 comments

Titles.... why does everything need a title? We are a people obsessed with categorizing and labeling. I guess this is to avoid feelings of chaos? I dunno. But I am sck of labels, categories and organized everything. Somethings just are. ... Read more
March 15
Tuesday, March 15, 2011      0 comments

I cannot seem to get this going. I am reading "Shrink Yourself" which is a psycho-analytic look at why we overeat. Having also started their online program, and beginning to clearly see the patterns of my using food as a numbing drug. But, gu... Read more
ranting
Sunday, January 30, 2011      1 comments

Why is it so hard to do this? i know how to eat right and exercise. I just can't seem to actually implement something and stick to it. I don't understand. Am I really that lazy? That self-sabotaging? Is it really tied to our messed up pasts... Read more
begin again
Sunday, August 22, 2010      3 comments

So when you fall down time and time again, I guess all you can do is get up. So here I am, getting up again. The things that help me on the journey: Writing down everything I eat and calculating the calories. Weighing myself regularly... Read more
LOST
Sunday, May 09, 2010      6 comments

I have lost my focus. Completely. I don't know why this happens exactly. I know it is stress induced. I also know that I have a bajiliion things going on right now. I put health last every time this happens. I know this has to change and I... Read more
waiting to fail? or .....
Saturday, April 10, 2010      1 comments

I have sat on this precipice before. I must like it. I track my calories, do my exercises and then find ways to cheat, rationalize and go back to the same old same old. So, how am I going to make it different this time? First of all I thi... Read more
food glorious food
Tuesday, March 30, 2010      6 comments

My problem is food. If it's not pre packaged and pre-caloried for me, I CAN'T DO IT..... And I am feeling overwhelmed. I also don't want to give up my weekend fun with the BF...... HELP!!!!! SOMEONE...... tell me what to eat and when. ... Read more
REALITY CHECK!!!!
Thursday, March 25, 2010      3 comments

OKay.... so good news first: I AM RUNNNING! And sticking with it, and liking it :-) It is building my confidence and making me feel really good about myself. I also am making a conscious effort to be positive in my thinking and to love mysel... Read more

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