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SLIMMERKIWI's Photo SLIMMERKIWI SparkPoints: (317,439)
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1/14/19 4:37 A



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I'm straight, but I have to totally agree with Patti (LADYSTARWIND)

I would imagine that if you experience the weight gain after coming out it might be likened to a bride who either goes on a diet prior to marriage, or ensure that they stay slim while dating. After they get married, the weight comes on because they have achieved their goal and relax more. In your case after coming out there may be less emotional need to keep the weight at bay to keep up appearances.

I have friends who are lesbian ... both mothers and both having been married to men previously. They take great pride in their appearance. My son and his husband also take pride in their appearance. Going by my son-in-laws photos nothing has changed prior to his coming out, and the same with my son, other than they are totally happy with where they are at and who they are. They are surrounded by family and friends who have always loved them for them and not a facade. They are both gym bunnies too, as are the lesbian friends/couple.

Kris

Edited by: SLIMMERKIWI at: 1/14/2019 (04:39)
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LADYSTARWIND's Photo LADYSTARWIND Posts: 5,690
1/13/19 4:12 P

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Just a side note.. on who notices/cares about appearance. In my experience, what identity you are has nothing to do with that topic. There are many women across the board who care...there are many who don't. I believe it has more to do with 'being comfortable in your skin', self confidence, being in a relationship (hey we all know the old jokes about "once they got married, she let her looks go to H___ ")and especially what your other passions and priorities are! The latter is the most important!!
patti

Patti
"The only thing we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us."
Gandalf: Lord of the Rings


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SHERYLDS's Photo SHERYLDS Posts: 18,117
1/12/19 7:11 P

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ANY kind of stress tends to make people react .

No matter what the situation is...
There are friends, there is family
and then there are friends who become our family.


Sheryl, New Jersey EST, 5% Challenge-TEDDY BEARS


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BLACK-CORSET's Photo BLACK-CORSET SparkPoints: (71)
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1/12/19 5:54 P

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I disagree that lesbian women don't worry about appearance. Lol...my girlfriend and I are both very aware of your looks.

I think the thing that stresses me out is lack of family support





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XDORITOS's Photo XDORITOS Posts: 820
1/7/19 4:27 P

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Lesbian women tend not to be so focused on the physical appearance...



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--MEOW--'s Photo --MEOW-- Posts: 5,149
1/7/19 10:27 A

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In my case, it actually motivated me to lose weight. I guess it depends on the circumstances and... also the kind of reaction and support you get from family and friends.

What's making you gain weight? is it emotional eating or... something else?

- Danny :)
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BLACK-CORSET's Photo BLACK-CORSET SparkPoints: (71)
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1/7/19 9:56 A

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I came out last year and I gained about 20 pounds...help



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