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LQUEST4754 SparkPoints: (59,088)
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2/7/11 6:46 A

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Welcome! Hope you will post often!

ILLINITEACHER52 Posts: 7,258
2/6/11 3:50 P

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Welcome to the team Carolyn!

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SHELLYHICKEY's Photo SHELLYHICKEY Posts: 7,755
2/6/11 3:48 P

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Welcome to both of you! ALL of us feel overwhelmed at times. It is that perfection monster that does it to us. Just hang in there!

The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president. You realize that you control your own destiny.

- Albert Ellis


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KARLY47's Photo KARLY47 Posts: 4,702
2/5/11 9:24 P

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Hello,I just joined your team,I am Carolyn from Fla.

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BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (304,401)
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2/5/11 8:09 P

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Are Sparkers just the best people, or what? I'm humbled and encouraged by your responses, plus some of you made me laugh!

FlyFrog, I love your image and your comments about your username! Thanks!

And no, I really don't plan to leave the team. I was thinking last night that it might be better not to read the reports of what others are getting done, since that tends to bring on the feelings of inadequacy, helplessness and fear.

Karen, I really like that phrase about living in your shoes, not in your head. I may tape that up on my computer. As I sat here crying last night, I was not able to remember to breathe and come back to the present where "There is nothing to need, hide from or fear, I am whole and complete right now and right here" to quote a favorite Living Love song refrain.

I haven't made the connection yet to understand why my clutter and lack of organization can bring up such strong emotions. Generally when the feelings are this intense, it means something is reminding me of the abuse, I'm somehow plugging into that childhood terror. But if I can recognize it, and remember to breathe, I can return to the present moment where I'm safe and strong and capable.

You are right, ILLINITEACHER52, getting organized isn't a contest. I don't lose if somebody else gets more done in less time. I win every time I create a new Oasis of Order and every day I maintain my clutter-free zones.

Thank you again, my marvelous Spark Friends and mentors. And stop by the BB's team page if you get a chance. Hopefully, this link will work:
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
nd
ividual.asp?gid=49097

Or if you search for 'brigade' you'll find us second; you can't miss our joyful babysteppin' poster girl!

Blessed Be, Amanda emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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ILLINITEACHER52 Posts: 7,258
2/5/11 1:18 P

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Wow - I had to take my own advice just now. I just did 2 15 minute flings of old greeting cards and other papers on my desk. I was pleased but then looked at how much more I have to do. I had to catch myself from slipping into negative thinking. It is easy to do. Now I am off to figure out what my reward will be for what I have accomplished so far.

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LANIDOLL's Photo LANIDOLL Posts: 179
2/5/11 12:42 P

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Hi Amanda -

I just started on this team, but I had this feeling about a few others I started on. Reading about others successes inspired yet intimidated me. Teams like '10K steps' when I could not get to 3K and reading the scores of the Just Dance team, when I took 3-4 dances to get to where they were in 1. I was ready to bail all over. HOWEVER, I started to compare myself to me - what did I do one day and how did I improve on my own record the next, or over the next few. I'm here to pull what I need, contribute what I can and learn and share. If you compare yourself to others you are setting yourself up. Plan your successes as improvement upon yourself and you'll be fine. It also helps to average over a few days since each individual day (or few hours depending) comes with it's own baggage that you can't always anticipate. Just keep going and be happy in the knowledge that you are doing your best and moving forward and you'll keep going. Now if I could only listen to my own words of wisdom it would be great. emoticon emoticon

Edited by: LANIDOLL at: 2/5/2011 (12:43)
Helane
2011 Spring 5%
Butterflies EL


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ILLINITEACHER52 Posts: 7,258
2/5/11 8:47 A

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Fly Lady is all about changing "Stinkin' Thinkin". Just celebrate each step you take - even if there are a few days in between! You will still make progress - one step at a time. It isn't a race.
(I like Dave Ramseys way of saying -Think crock pot, not microwave.) Slow and steady makes a difference.

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CD8578560 Posts: 1,751
2/5/11 7:31 A

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AMANDA-I, of all people, realize how hard it is not to compare myself to others. It's a habit I started the day I came home from the hospital to a 4 yo brother who never wanted a sibling. And my father worships the ground that boy walks on!

HOWEVER, I practice detaching from that poor habit & then practice a better habit--mindfulness, being in the present. If I'm in the present, I have energy to do the next thing.

If I'm up in my head, comparing myself to anyone, I'm without energy b/c I'm not following a simple rule--Live in your shoes, not in your head.

Together we can do this, not by comparing ourselves to others, but by holding each other up, energizing each other to be who we were created to be.

CAROLINAGIRL45's Photo CAROLINAGIRL45 Posts: 368
2/5/11 6:03 A

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Amanda, I hope you change your mind. I've been flying on and off since I found FL's site what must have been 12 to 13 years ago? Probably around the time she started it. I've been a real slacker on my routines and trying to get back to it, but struggling, too. Those baby steps you're taking are exactly what flying is all about. The baby steps are better than no steps at all. As another poster said, we all have to go at our own pace. Please reconsider and try to see the success stories as something to inspire you instead of something to compare yourself to.

My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-three today and we don't know where the hell she is. ~Ellen DeGeneres


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FLYFROG's Photo FLYFROG SparkPoints: (0)
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2/5/11 5:04 A

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Amanda, don't feel bad about how long it is taking. It takes different people different amounts of time. I've been a member of flylady for years and still feel like I have a long way to go. I even choose my sparkpeople name because of all the hops and flops I seem to take instead of flapping and flying. But I still have hope that even a frog can FLY. But for now I'm just working on making the flop feeling a little more like a landing and less like the little frog on the frogger game after he has been hit by a car.

Good luck on whatever you choose to do and with the new babysteps team emoticon .

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~

Words of wisdom from Yoda:
Just Do It: “Do or do not... there is no try.”

Be Fearless: “Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.”

Love Yourself: “Size matters not, ... Look at me. Judge me by size, do you?”

~Jennifer~


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LQUEST4754 SparkPoints: (59,088)
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2/5/11 1:49 A

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I don't think there are many here who have it all figured out. I certainly don't. My basement and upstairs have not been addressed. I haven't yet visited babysteps. Tell us about it.

LINDA!'s Photo LINDA! Posts: 135,928
2/5/11 12:26 A

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Hope you change your mind...you can join us with chat. Many of us are still struggling with many issues. The friendship on the team helps us to feel inspired and motivated.

Linda - EST.
Flylady:Peace is Mine Team Leader

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BLESSEDBEING's Photo BLESSEDBEING SparkPoints: (304,401)
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2/5/11 12:11 A

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I'm embarrassed to admit that when I read about all the successes you wonderful ladies are having, I feel envious and amazed, but I also wonder if we can really belong to the same species, and try as I might not to do it, I end up comparing myself to you and feeling like a failure. It can actually hurt to read glowing reports of your leaps and bounds when I end up resting a couple of days between taking one little babystep and the next.
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I don't want to leave the Peace Is Mine team (I love the name too much), but I'll be spending more time with the new Babysteps Brigade team, trying to work myself up to where I can read a whole discussion here without ending up in tears.
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I truly wish you all continued success in all your efforts, as I concentrate on building my as-yet under-developed organizing muscles. Blessed Be, Amanda
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Blessed Be, Amanda

"I love myself the way I am, and still I want to grow;
But change outside can only come when deep inside I know:
I'm beautiful and capable of being the best me I can,
And I love myself just the way I am."

[by Jai Josefs in his amazing song I Love Myself the Way I Am]

Co-leader of the Babysteps Brigade (BBs), A Gathering of Goddesses (GGs), Survivors of Abuse (SAssies) teams.


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