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FUNLOVEN's Photo FUNLOVEN Posts: 2,604
6/25/19 11:51 A

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DAY #77 MY SABOTAGE TOOLBOX - ROUND 2

I found interesting, Paula, that you think people won't even notice what you're up to. You are probably right, but I seem to frequently take note of what others have on their plate or in their grocery cart. Kind of judgmental on my part I guess because I always end up having thoughts like "OMG, you have that junk in your house?" or "No wonder you weigh so much?" or "Do you have any idea what you are doing to your health?" and I especially like "Good for you making such healthy choices!".

It is important for me to remember what Linda tells us "that most times people really aren't out to harm my weight-loss efforts. They usually don't even realize they might be sabotaging you. Even good friends or family members can forget that you are working so hard to stay on your weight-loss program".

All I need in my toolbox is determination and focus, like Babs, a decision to be my own saboteur or hero, like Phyllis, and a sincere "No Thank You"!

Sue

Michigan - EST

LIVE-BREATHE-ENJOY LIFE!
"Live life to its fullest and make the most of every day."


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PAULALALALA's Photo PAULALALALA Posts: 27,025
6/19/19 9:41 P

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Watch for people or situations that might sabotage your efforts. Record what you notice.

.....I notice that people usually won't even notice what you're up to (as far as food consumption) if you don't bring it to their attention by telling them you're trying to lose weight, or eat healthy... BUT.....when a situation does occur, I have several responses -- delay, or say I'll take some home for later (if I truly think DH will enjoy it), or the doctor/dentist excuse. "I'm avoiding sugar since my root canal".or..."I'd love some, but my doctor has given me 3 months to bring my cholesterol down or we're talking meds"

I've used responses like these several times and they seem to do the trick.

Paula -- Waco, TX area
CST zone

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YOUNG-AT-HEART's Photo YOUNG-AT-HEART Posts: 1,673
6/18/19 9:34 P

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emoticon DAY #77 emoticon

Day 77 - My sabotage toolbox







Sabotage happens only if you allow it. Even if someone is intentionally trying to make you slip up, stay strong and committed to your plan. Remind yourself that you are determined to live at a healthy weight and that you value that outcome more than being part of a crowd..

Today

Watch for people or situations that might sabotage your efforts. Record what you notice.
Choose a response you will feel comfortable saying when this happens. Write it down, then practice saying it out loud.
Record what happens when you use this response to avoid sabotage.

As I wrote yesterday, I am my own worst enemy when it comes to who tries to sabotage my efforts.

When I notice my sabotage starts to happen, I will think about the tempting food and say It looks great, maybe later.

When I tried it today, it worked for me. I think the indefinite postponement and putting it off until later is a good idea and it can work for me.

I also really like the idea of telling myself to remember my long-term goals and, before sabotaging myself, ask myself Can I continue making this bad choice over and over again, day after day, during the next 30 days, and will it hurt or help me reaching my goals?






~~~MARILYN ~~~
Virginia - Eastern Time Zone
The worst thing to be without--hope.
The most effective sleeping pill--peace of mind.
The main reason my past diets failed--lack of motivation.
The greatest "shot in the arm"-- encouragement.


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SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 18,861
6/18/19 4:00 P

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The sister of one of the men who I support sometimes works nearby and parks her car in our car-park. As a kind of 'thank you' she always brings bags/boxes of baked goods like doughnuts and chelsea buns - that kind of thing.

Today she even brought them in a plastic bag that said 'Slimming World' on it - it was a weird kind of joke I think. My colleague, who goes to Slimming World, said "I don't even want to see them!" and I agreed - seeing them would activate my carb-craving brain!

Fortunately I'd just eaten my tea too - and another colleague came on shift (male) who was glad to take the bag with him - out of our sight!

I don't think she means to sabotage us - but people seem to shower people with learning disabilities with cakes, chocolates, sweets, salted snacks and soda/pop! Even though they really do not need it (most are overweight as they prefer to eat pastry, pasta, cookies, fried foods, processed stuff etc). Incidentally, she is slim and doesn't seem to eat these things herself.

There are several men on our team who do enjoy the doughnuts and stuff.......

Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
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Body Thrive - Autumn 2019 Anchor statement "I live a courageous life with energy and confidence"
JUNEPA's Photo JUNEPA Posts: 14,228
6/18/19 2:47 P

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Day 77 My sabotage toolbox

Sabotage happens only if you allow it. Even if someone is intentionally trying to make you slip up, stay strong and committed to your plan. Remind yourself that you are determined to live at a healthy weight and that you value that outcome more than being part of a crowd..

Today

Watch for people or situations that might sabotage your efforts. Record what you notice.
Choose a response you will feel comfortable saying when this happens. Write it down, then practice saying it out loud.
Record what happens when you use this response to avoid sabotage.

Watch for people or situations that might sabotage your efforts. Record what you notice.

Social peer pressure to provide baking and junk food snack treats for workers at our farm. It seems everyone else does and it makes them popular with the crew.

Two years ago we built a new barn, and the construction crew was previously at a neighbour's place. The wife of the farmer at the previous construction site said she "takes care of the crew and sends them out lots of home baking for their breaks and lunch" and she seemed to be competitive about being the most popular with the crew. She kind of felt me out if I was going to do that. I said I wasn't going to do that, and thought to myself, why would I sent out unhealthy fatty sugary snacks. She seemed satisfied that she would retain popular status with the crew. Why would I want to contribute to unhealthy eating. Another neighbour who came to harvest at our place, and our family often helps with their harvests, same thing. My DH when he goes there gets plenty of baking at lunch and the wife sends out packets of chocolate bars, chips, cookies and pop for their snacks. Last week when we were harvesting and I hosted the lunch and the farmer brought his 3yo grandson with him. He remarked that his daughter sends snacks like raw peas and carrots and that his grandkids love that. He seemed amazed. I thought, good for his daughter, instilling healthy eating practices in her children.

Choose a response you will feel comfortable saying when this happens. Write it down, then practice saying it out loud.

I haven't come up with a good response. I don't want to say something judgemental although I definitely feel that way. I wish I had a good response, I usually say nothing but do what I want.

On another topic, I once read on Dear Abby a person not knowing what to say when someone asks personal information that she didn't want to divulge. Abby told her to say "Why do you want to know" I thought that was a great answer as it saves you from being defensive with some kind of explanation why you don't want to tell them and puts the shoe on the other foot, they have to defend why they want to know and usually they don't press further.

I haven't found a response I would like to use with food pushers yet.

Record what happens when you use this response to avoid sabotage.

N/A

Edited by: JUNEPA at: 6/18/2019 (14:59)
June -- Pacific Time Zone
Where you end up is more important than how fast or where you start out.
- Improved fitness and nutrition, energy and confidence are my rewards.
It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
A PH (personal high) is the main goal, a PB is the sometime icing on the cake.
Never underestimate the inevitability of gradualness.
Sopra le nebbie delle valle e le vicende della vita sorge una promessa di luce e serenita.


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MASTERPIECE8's Photo MASTERPIECE8 Posts: 9,848
6/18/19 10:26 A

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The most important tool in my sabotage toolbox is determination and focus. My family and friends do not try to sabotage me either. I've done it to myself numerous times! That's why my determination and focus have been placed in my toolbox and will remain there.

Babs
SW Illinois - CST


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MAWMAW101's Photo MAWMAW101 Posts: 12,448
6/18/19 6:24 A

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100 More DWL, Day 77 My sabotage toolbox
There are several things Ive learned to keep in my toolbox.
Saying Ill wait a while or getting in the buffet line last helps.
If Im waiting I can grab a water and chat with everyone.
If Im last in line nobody pays any attention to what I choose most of the time because they have already chosen.
My best friends and family dont push food and many now eat more healthy.
emoticon This generally leaves the choice up to me to be the saboteur or the hero of my plan.

Phyllis ~~
Indiana - Eastern Time

20/20 Vision- What we focus on expands. Never give up on the dream!


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CAROLYNINJOY1's Photo CAROLYNINJOY1 Posts: 12,173
9/21/18 5:30 A

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100 More DWL, Day 77 My sabotage toolbox

Sabotage happens only if you allow it. Even if someone is intentionally trying to make you slip up, stay strong and committed to your plan. Remind yourself that you are determined to live at a healthy weight and that you value that outcome more than being part of a crowd..

Today

Watch for people or situations that might sabotage your efforts. Record what you notice.
Choose a response you will feel comfortable saying when this happens. Write it down, then practice saying it out loud.

Record what happens when you use this response to avoid sabotage.

I am blessed with a tremendously supportive partner who helps me in every way. I do not go into situations where people would attempt to make me slip up.

I am fully committed to reach and maintain my healthy weight. I'm just stubborn enough not to desire being part of a crowd.


Joy is a Choice. Choose joy moment by moment.

When all else fails, persistence prevails.

Injoy:) Carolyn

(Arizona - Mountain Standard Time)

My personal story as a blog:
https://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_p
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FUNLOVEN's Photo FUNLOVEN Posts: 2,604
9/4/18 7:52 A

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Day #77 My Sabotage Toolbox

Linda tells us that sabotage can happen anywhere and IT IS MY JOB to manage these situations instead of feeling angry or frustrated with the situation.

Tools in my toolbox:
1. Magic Phrase - No Thanks. I'm going to wait a bit.
2. Don't include talk about dieting in your conversations.
3. Blame your doctor? I do have a dx of high triglycerides and SP just had a nice article about it.

Linda reminds us that sabotage happens only if I allow it. I need to remember that my goals are more important than pleasing other people.

We have discussed sabotagers a lot lately and I am ready to get off the subject. The point has been made. On a positive note, I blamed DH as my biggest saboteur , but the other day I was grateful that he choose a restaurant for lunch that did not serve alcohol. And yesterday we had lunch at a Sub-Way (no alcohol there!). If I can avoid places for lunch that serve alcohol it helps me achieve my goal by at least 50% because then all I have to deal with is dinner. Goal is 0-1 drinks per day. Hasn't happened yet. I'm still at 2 glasses of something with my dinner.

Sue

Michigan - EST

LIVE-BREATHE-ENJOY LIFE!
"Live life to its fullest and make the most of every day."


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GOCALGAL's Photo GOCALGAL Posts: 5,162
9/2/18 8:10 P

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Watch for people or situations that might sabotage your efforts. Record what you notice.

Repeated studying of the 100 Days has made me so much more aware of sabotage both by people and situations. It is rare that something or someone surprises me. At this point, after noticing, what I need is to pay more attention to what I tell myself and choose to do about it.

Choose a response you will feel comfortable saying when this happens. Write it down, then practice saying it out loud.

Humor helps~ I can't have that it makes me break out, hips and thighs~ or like Linda suggests~ too full not now but later. Another thing I have done on the rare occasion where some one's feelings might get honestly hurt, say at a potluck or when someone has worked hard making something for a family dinner, is take some, push it around on my plate or hide it with a napkin and quietly throw it away later.

Record what happens when you use this response to avoid sabotage.

These work well when I stick to my guns and do not talk myself into thinking otherwise or when I do not allow myself occasional treats and begin to feel overly deprived.


Edited by: GOCALGAL at: 9/2/2018 (20:16)
Maria ~ So. Cal. ~ Pacific Time Zone
Smile, hug, encourage others

"It's not the mountain we conquer,
But ourselves." unknown

Winning is Not Quitting

FOCUSONME57's Photo FOCUSONME57 Posts: 7,356
9/2/18 7:33 A

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CAT125's Photo CAT125 Posts: 28,446
9/2/18 5:51 A

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Day 77 My sabotage toolbox

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon




emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon


Cat, in Florida
Eastern Time Zone


Pounds lost in 2020......


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SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 18,861
9/2/18 1:32 A

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"Sabotage happens only if you allow it......... Remind yourself that you are determined to live at a healthy weight and that you value that outcome..... "

"Not for me, thanks"

This phrase will work anywhere, parties, potluck, restaurants.
I think it works with snacks and desserts and second helpings with friends and family, but it's more tricky when they have prepared a meal.

My son and daughter-in-law are ok; they ask me, and let me help myself. With them I can say what I want. Sometimes I make a 'best choice' to fit in.

My brother and sister-in-law eat quite well, but based on my last visit I have difficulty with the goodies available. I will need to decide in advance what my plan will be. I don't think they will push me but I will need a lot of self-control.

I don't eat out much. There are pros and cons to not eating with others very often: on the one hand I don't have to deal with it often; on the other hand, I don't get much practice!

I do worry about losing control around sugar and baked/fried things with flour etc! I feel so terrible when I manage to resist for hours and then cave in later. It doesn't help people take my refusals seriously!

I guess Linda's "Not just yet; maybe in a while" could be a way to delay, but not lose face if I have some later.......

I am actually quite anxious about being away from home visiting my brother in October! I know how quickly I can pile on pounds if I say "yes" to cheese, bread, pastry, cookies, cakes, salty snacks, booze. I also know how quickly my "addicthead" gets the better of me once I allow that stuff in.

"Not at the moment, thanks".

Watching other people eat sometimes helps me. Last night I watched people eat potato chips from the "nibbles" table at a poetry-reading evening . A man who had said "no" to wine earlier, because he was driving, later had a wine glass in his hand. I was offered crisps several times; I did say that I didn't dare start on them as once I start I can't stop reaching for more.

It's not easy! "Oh, those do look nice. I might have one later!" ( I really hope I don't!).
Pass me the water!
emoticon

I cannot do the doctor lie. But I could offer an explanation that people might accept.....like that I am trying to stay off x,y,z because I am getting arthritis in my fingers........ I think that might be a good line. It might work on myself too!




Edited by: SWEETENUFGILL at: 9/2/2018 (01:47)
Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
s.asp


Body Thrive - Autumn 2019 Anchor statement "I live a courageous life with energy and confidence"
AURA18's Photo AURA18 Posts: 11,065
8/26/18 6:17 P

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Day 77 My sabotage toolbox - for marketing tricks = impulse buying
Part of problem - shopping when I am too tired to think straight. DH will food shop once I find "best buys" for our new way of eating. Other things I can shop online and read reviews to decide if I really want an item. Stopped buying food online, when received past sell by date. I felt it was another trick and didn't want the hassle for returns.
wikihow.com/Stop-Impulse-Buying bit.ly/2ochcEU

Edited by: AURA18 at: 8/27/2018 (14:33)
Maribeth MN CT Black Panthers draxe.com/ dance u.nu/ixjy planks u.nu/9w-u hands u.nu/httpsunu7lag
bit.ly/BLC41
FOCUSONME57's Photo FOCUSONME57 Posts: 7,356
5/8/18 10:13 P

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Day 77 My sabotage toolbox

Sabotage happens only if you allow it. Even if someone is intentionally trying to make you slip up, stay strong and committed to your plan. Remind yourself that you are determined to live at a healthy weight and that you value that outcome more than being part of a crowd..

Today

Watch for people or situations that might sabotage your efforts. Record what you notice.
Choose a response you will feel comfortable saying when this happens. Write it down, then practice saying it out loud.
Record what happens when you use this response to avoid sabotage.

Link to Day 76 www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/
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Link to Day 78
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/
team_messa
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Edited by: FOCUSONME57 at: 5/19/2018 (17:00)
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